If a guy who you thought was a friend leans in and kisses you, it’s going to be surprising and confusing!
Does it mean he likes you more than a friend?
Is he just being really friendly?
Is he trying to play games with you?
Before you jump to conclusions, there can be a number of reasons to explain why he’s kissed you – and it’s worth investigating!
Here are 10 reasons why a guy who is a friend might kiss you, how you should respond, and what to do next!
Why Did He Kiss Me If We Are Just Friends? 10 Reasons!
1. He’s Falling for You
Let’s start with what is probably the most obvious reason why a guy crosses that line and kisses a girl – he’s falling for you.
If a guy who you thought was just a friend suddenly kisses you, it’s likely that he’s been harboring feelings for you and has finally built up the courage to make a move.
If this is the case, it’s important to be honest with him about your feelings.
If you don’t want to pursue anything further with him, let him know and let him down gently now before he falls even further.
But if you do like him, too, then this could be the start of something wonderful!
2. He Got Carried Away in The Heat of The Moment
Sometimes, a guy might kiss you without meaning to or even realizing it!
If you were joking around with each other and things got a little too rowdy, he might have gotten caught up in the moment and kissed you without thinking.
In this case, there’s no need to overthink it – just enjoy the fact that he likes you enough to get carried away.
He may be a little embarrassed, so don’t give him too much stick for it!
3. He’s Testing His Boundaries With You
If a guy kisses you and then backs off immediately afterwards, he might be testing his boundaries with you.
He’s gauging your reaction to see how you feel about him and whether there might be something more between you.
If this is the case, it’s important not to give him mixed signals.
Be clear with him about your feelings and whether you would like to pursue anything further.
4. He Wants to Be a Guy Who Kisses Friends
There are some guys out there who just want to be the kind of guy who kisses his friends.
He might have seen it in a movie or TV show and thought it looked cool, so he’s trying it out on you.
Or maybe he’s just curious about what it would be like.
In this case, you can play along and take it for nothing more than him taking a ‘continental’ approach or tell him that you don’t want him to kiss you again.
5. He Thinks You Like Him
If a guy kisses you, it could be because he’s misreading your signals and thinks that you like him.
Maybe you’ve been a little too friendly with him or given him some subtle hints that you’re interested (at least that’s how he’s reading your body language).
Or maybe he just wants to kiss you so badly that he’s willing to take the risk in case you do like him.
It’s worth asking him about this or taking a harder look at his actions to see if he’s misinterpreting signals.
6. He Was Drunk or Under the Influence
If you were both out at a party or bar and he kissed you, it might be because he was drunk or under the influence of something.
In this case, it’s important not to read too much into it. He may not even remember kissing you!
It’s never an excuse for crossing a line and doing something that puts you in an awkward situation, but these things happen from time to time.
Often, the best thing to do is just let it go and don’t mention it again unless he does.
7. He Thought You Needed Lifting Up
If you were having a tough day and he kissed you, it might be because he wanted to lift your spirits.
A lot of guys see kissing as a way to make someone feel better, so this could be his intention.
It’s a nice gesture and one that you should appreciate, even if you don’t want to pursue anything further with him.
But I’d still make it clear to him where the boundaries in your friendship are, just in case this is the start of something more for him.
8. He Wants to Be ‘Friends with Benefits’
A guy might kiss you if he’s hoping to turn your friendship into something more physical.
He might see you as someone who he can hook up with or have a casual fling with, without any strings attached.
If this is the case, it’s important to be clear with him about what you want.
Guys often try to cross this line with girls who they’re friends with as it’s easier than forming this kind of relationship with a stranger.
But if you’re not interested, make it clear to him that you’re just friends and nothing more.
9. He Thought You Were About to Kiss Him
If you were both leaning in close to each other or standing in a romantic way, he might have thought you were about to kiss him.
In this case, it’s not entirely his fault and he may not have ‘wanted’ to do it, he was just responding to your body language.
But it’s still worth letting him know that you weren’t intending to kiss him so that he’s aware for next time.
10. He’s Trying to Show Off in Front of His Friends
This kind of reason never feels good, and it may make you question just how good of a friend this guy is, but it’s possible he’s just trying to show off in front of his friends.
He might think it’ll make them laugh or that he’ll be considered more of a player, but it’s hard to say.
It’s an immature reason to kiss someone and not one that should be condoned, if you think this is why he did it you’re entitled to give him a piece of your mind!
What Type of Kiss Was It?
The type and intensity of the kiss he gave you also plays a huge role in what his reasoning or intentions may have been.
Was it a gentle peck on the lips or something more passionate?
Did he use his tongue or keep it strictly PG-13?
These things all matter when trying to figure out his motives.
Here are a few different types of kisses and what they might mean:
A Gentle Peck – This is usually just a friendly kiss, especially if it’s on the cheek. It might be his way of saying goodbye or thank you, without it meaning anything more than that.
A Closed Mouth Kiss – This is usually a sign that he likes you as more than just a friend but isn’t sure if you feel the same way. He might be testing the waters to see how you react or waiting for you to make the first move.
An Open Mouth Kiss – This is usually a sign that he’s really into you and wants something more. He might be hoping to take things to the next level with you, either physically or emotionally.
A French Kiss – This is usually a sign of strong passion and desire, whether it’s platonic or romantic. He might be trying to ignite a spark between the two of you or show you how he feels.
Kissing on the Cheek – This is usually a sign of affection, especially if it’s accompanied by a hug. It might be his way of showing you that he cares about you and wants to make you feel good.
Kissing on the Lips – This is usually a sign of attraction and can be either platonic or romantic. He might be trying to show you how he feels or gauge your reaction to see if you’re interested in him too.
Look At His Overall Body Language for More Cues
Guys leave other body language cues when they’re interested in a girl or if they’re up to something else.
So, if you’re still not sure why he kissed you, look at his overall body language for more clues.
Some other things to look for are:
- How close is he standing to you? Is he invading your personal space or keeping a respectful distance?
- What is the tone of his voice like when he’s talking to you? Is he flirty or more reserved?
- What is his eye contact like when he’s around you? Is he making prolonged eye contact or quickly looking away?
- What kind of touch does he use when he’s around you? Does he touch you a lot or not at all?
All of these things can give you a better idea of what his intentions might be and whether or not he’s interested in you as more than just a friend.
What Does a Kiss Mean for A Guy?
This is hard to answer in one word – a kiss can mean a lot of things for a guy, depending on the type of kiss and the overall context.
It could be a sign of affection, attraction, or simply a way to show gratitude.
If you’re still not sure why he kissed you, the best thing to do is talk to him about it directly.
This way you can get a better idea of what his intentions were and whether or not he sees you as more than just a friend.
Image credits – Photo by Leonardo Miranda on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.