I hear this often; ‘will I ever hear from my ex again?’
No matter your feelings for your ex, the thought of never hearing from them again can be a painful one.
Or, maybe you don’t want to hear from them again and the thought is making you anxious?
Either way, in this article I’m going to explain how you can increase your chances of hearing from an ex again – or not!
Will I Ever Hear From My Ex Again?
It’s impossible for me to say if you’ll hear from your ex again for sure, only they really know that.
What I can tell you, however, is that most people do hear from an ex again.
It may take weeks, months, or even years, but statistically speaking, most people hear from their ex in some form.
If you’re afraid that you will not hear from them again, but want to hear from them, there are some things you can do to increase the chance of that happening.
Without contacting them first, of course.
Likewise, if you’re actually one of the few people who never want to hear from an ex again and it’s bothering you thinking about whether or not they’ll reach out, you can also do something about that!
How Long Does It Take an Ex to Reach Out?
If you’re asking how long it’ll take for your ex to contact you, it really varies.
I’ve had people reach out to me the next day after breaking up and I’ve had people take years.
There is no real rule when it comes to this, unfortunately, which makes it all the more difficult.
The good news is that if you want to hear from your ex again, there are a few things you can do without being the one to contact them:
How to Make Your Ex Reach out And Contact You
A few of the things I recommend trying are:
Showing How Well You’re Doing on Social Media
This is probably one of the most effective things you can do if you want to make your ex contact you again.
By making it known on social media that you’re doing well – i.e., posting happy pictures, talking about fun things you’re doing, etc.
You’re essentially giving them a FOMO (fear of missing out) and giving them things to ask you about or comment on.
You could even do some things you know they’re interested in or take a trip the two of you always wanted and never took to really get their attention.
Giving Them the Silent Treatment and Disappearing Off Social Media
Some people need to see that you’re doing well on social media to reach out and contact you.
Others will be satisfied with that and not contact you. If your ex is like that, you could go silent on social media and make them curious as to what you’re up to.
You could also delete social media altogether for a little while – this can work well if you know they check your profile often.
Again, this will make them curious and may prompt them to reach out to you.
Keeping in Touch with Mutual Friends
If you have mutual friends, this can be a great way to make your ex contact you.
By keeping in touch with them and talking to them about things going on in your life, they’ll eventually hear about it from the friend and want to talk to you themselves.
This is an indirect method that I’ve used myself to great effect, I hope it works for you too!
Not Changing Any of Your Contact Details
Something important to keep in mind is that if your ex is keeping their distance from you and your circle of friends, you shouldn’t change your phone number or other contact details.
I know it’s not as hard to find people in this day and age as it used to be, but it just reduces the chances of you receiving a text or message from them out of the blue someday.
What Are The Reasons Why an Ex Might Never Contact You Again?
You need to be prepared for the fact that an ex may never contact you again.
It’s a painful reality to face, especially if you felt like you had something special while you were together and you miss them dearly.
A few of the reasons why they may not ever contact you again are:
- They’ve moved on and are happy with someone else and don’t feel like revisiting their past
- They have their own reasons to want to forget about you and the relationship
- They’re not ready to face you or talk about what happened, and might never be
- You hurt them too much and they can’t forgive you yet (or may never be able to)
- They just aren’t emotionally mature enough to be friends
All of these are valid reasons why your ex may never contact you again.
I want you to remember that just because they don’t want to contact you, it doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong.
How to Make Sure an Ex Doesn’t Contact You Again
I’m sure most of us wouldn’t mind an ex popping up and reaching out, but I’m aware that there are some situations where hearing from an ex is the last thing you want.
If you don’t want your ex to contact you again and it’s causing you anxiety to think that they might come back into your life, there are some things you can do to stop them:
- You can change your phone number and tell any mutual friends not to pass your new number on to them
- You can block them on all of your social media platforms
- You can tell mutual friends to let them know that you never want to hear from them again
- On the extreme side, you can move house and make sure they don’t get your new address
- You may need to send them one last message telling them you never want to hear from them again and to respect your wishes
If your ex does contact you in some way, ignoring them is the most powerful way to give them the message that you don’t want to be in contact with them.
It’s going to take some strength, but whatever the outcome you want is – you can make it happen.
Image credits – Photo by John Tuesday on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.