Whether you’re trying to move on after a breakup or get your ex back, one of the most powerful things you can do is ignore them.
It’s natural to want to contact an ex, and they might even be DMing or texting you a lot.
But that constant contact is probably causing more emotional harm than it is good.
Here are 10 reasons why ignoring your ex is a powerful way to get your head straight.
10 Reasons Why Ignoring Your Ex Is Powerful
1. You Need Time to Come to Terms with The Split
When a relationship ends, it’s normal to feel a range of emotions like sadness, anger, and confusion to name just a few.
You might even feel like you’re not yourself.
It can take some time to come to terms with what happened and why things didn’t work out.
And that’s OK!
The problem is that if you’re constantly in communication with your ex, you can’t come to terms with what happened for yourself.
2. You Need Time to Grieve the Loss of The Relationship
Similar to the first point, you need time to grieve the loss of the relationship.
This is a process that everyone goes through when a relationship comes to an end and it’s really not dissimilar to losing something important in your life.
If you’re in constant communication with your ex, you can’t fully grieve and move on and you’ll notice that you have lingering feelings about your ex and your relationship.
3. You Will Make Space to Be Filled with New Experiences
One of the best things about being (newly) single is that you have the opportunity to explore your own life and meet new people.
You can focus on your hobbies, travel, work, and anything else that you’re passionate about.
If you’re spending all of your time talking to your ex or thinking about them, then you’re not giving yourself the space to do things that are going to help you move forward emotionally and mentally.
4. You Can Let Go of Any Negativity
When you’re in communication with your ex, it’s easy to hold onto any negativity that you might be feeling towards them.
You might be reliving old arguments or feeling upset about the way things ended, or maybe they’re just being toxic.
Whatever it is, you don’t need any kind of negativity in your life.
But when you ignore your ex, you’re giving yourself the opportunity to let go of that negativity and move on.
5. You Can Spend More Time Working on Yourself
After a breakup – or just in general – the more time you spend working on improving and caring for yourself, the better.
This is something that’s really important after a breakup because it can help you feel better about yourself and build your confidence.
You can focus on your own happiness and wellbeing, and that will lead to a much more positive outlook on life.
By staying in touch with your ex, however, unless they have your best interests at heart – which is unusual – you’re not going to reach your best potential.
6. They Can’t Bring You Down
One of the reasons why ignoring your ex is powerful is because it means they can’t bring you down any longer.
If they were a drain on you while you were in a relationship, you can be sure they’re also going to drain you when you’re not an item.
It’s simpler to just ignore them than it is to try to help them or find some kind of happy middle.
7. It Gives You Time to Figure out What Your True Feelings Are
When you’re constantly in communication with your ex, it’s hard to figure out what your true feelings about your breakup are.
Do you still have lingering feelings?
Are you just feeling nostalgic?
Is this person really good for you?
By giving yourself some space, you can start to figure out how you truly feel about your ex, the breakup, and on a broader scope your future.
8. It Will Make Them Chase You (if That’s What You Want)
Ignoring an ex or giving them silent treatment is also a common tactic that’s known to be effective at making them jealous.
If you want your ex back, ignoring them is a powerful way to make them chase you harder.
They’ll start to wonder why you’re not interested in them anymore and will probably find more creative ways to try and get your attention.
Of course, this can backfire if you really just don’t want to hear from them. You might have to send them a message to that effect.
9. You Can Assess if You Want to Be Friends
In some cases, it might be possible to remain friends with your ex after a breakup.
But this is usually only the case if you were friends before you started dating.
If you try to be friends with someone who you’ve just come out of a relationship with, it’s usually not going to work out very well.
You need to give yourselves some time to figure out how you both feel first. So, ignoring them until you feel like you’re at that point is the best move.
Related – Reasons why guys ignore texts if they’re ‘busy‘.
10. You Can Prove to Yourself that You’re Stronger On Your Own
Finally, ignoring your ex can also be a way to prove to yourself that you’re stronger on your own than you thought you would be.
It takes a lot of strength and courage to walk away from someone who you care about – especially if they don’t want you to go.
But it’s important to remember that you’re doing this for yourself.
It might be hard in the beginning, but eventually, you’ll start to feel better and be glad that you made the decision to move on.
Is Silence the Best Response to An Ex?
Silence isn’t always going to be the best response to an ex, it depends on the relationship the two of you have and what your future goals are.
However, in the short term, it’s often the best thing as it gives the two of you space to figure out where your heads and hearts are.
Is Ignoring an Ex the Best Revenge?
It’s not always the best idea to seek revenge, but if that’s what you’re after then silence can be a very effective strategy.
How Does It Make Your Ex Feel when You Ignore Them?
Depending on the situation, ignoring an ex can make them feel a whole range of emotions from anger and frustration to sadness and loneliness.
It all depends on how they react to being ignored and what their goals are.
For some people, being ignored by an ex is a powerful way to make them regret splitting and cause them to try and get back together.
Image credits – Photo by Chase Chappell on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.