Dating is nerve-racking (and exhilarating) at times, especially in the early phase and first few dates.
If you’ve had two dates with someone and it’s going well, you might be wondering what the ideal time between second and third dates to wait is.
It’s a tough question to answer as it depends on a number of factors.
Here is a look at how long most people wait in between their second and third dates and how you can best figure it out for your own situation:
The Ideal Time Between Second and Third Date
As a general rule of thumb, most people wait a day or two after a second date to arrange a third date.
They then arrange the third date within the next week or so depending on when they are available.
It’s always a tough thing to figure out and causes a lot of people anxiety, so don’t feel bad if you’ve been stressing over this.
The bottom line, however, is that you’re always going to be better off just putting something out there and asking than you are waiting because you’re nervous.
It’s more important that you keep in touch and start arranging another date than it is getting something set in stone.
Anxieties about whether or not there will be another date rise when there is no communication more so than how long it’ll be.
So, make sure you’re staying in touch with your date, even if you can’t set up a date in the near future that suits both of your calendars.
How Often Should You Text Between the Second and Third Date?
This brings up another important question that I know a lot of people also stress over.
It’s normal in this day and age to text someone a lot, but there is a thin line between texting someone too much – or too little – between seeing them.
The best thing you can do is to text them most days if you felt a good connection and know there will be a third date.
But as hard as it is to avoid, you really don’t want to engage in non-stop texting all day and night.
This can often just come off as needy and desperate, and you’ll run out of things to talk about when you meet in person!
If you want to keep the conversations flowing before your next date, ask them about something they’re passionate about or something they’ve been meaning to do.
It’s better to learn more about them and have things to discuss when you see them than it is to just text for the sake of texting.
Is Two Weeks Between Second and Third Date Too Long?
This is another tough one as it depends on the situation.
If you’re both busy and can’t seem to find a time that works for both of you in the next week or two, it’s not a big deal.
But if you’re both free and one person is just taking their sweet time to set something up, it might be a red flag.
The best thing you can do is just communicate with your date and see what’s going on.
If they’re taking a while to set something up, you can always ask if they’re free for coffee or lunch one day next week to make it easier.
This way, you can at least touch base and see how they’re doing without having to wait two weeks for another evening date.
It’s Normal to Be Nervous About a Third Date
I just want to help lessen the nerves a little by pointing out that no matter how well the first two dates went, it’s normal to feel a bit nervous about meeting up again.
In fact, a lot of people are more nervous about a third date than they are about the first two!
This is because, by the third date, you usually have a pretty good idea of whether or not there is potential for something more and you might be hoping things progress a little.
If you’re feeling butterflies, it means you’re probably onto something good.
The best thing you can do is just relax and be yourself.
Being yourself is what got you to this point and is why your date wants to see you again, so don’t try and change things up or do something out of your comfort zone.
Just let things flow naturally and see where they take you.
What to Expect from A Third Date?
Again, there are no hard and fast rules as to what to expect from a third date.
Everyone moves at their own pace and there are a lot of things to consider when going into a third date.
I’m sure you’ve heard of the ‘Third Date Rule’.
This rule says it’s normal to expect to be intimate on a third date, but honestly, this is just some rule that gained momentum in popular culture but there is nothing to it.
It’s much better for your nerves (and mental health) if you go into the third date without any expectations, per se, and just go with the flow and see where it takes you.
That’s all there is to it, while I can’t give you an exact timeline between the second and third dates, I hope my perspective has helped.
The important thing is that you’re communicating with your date, as I’m sure you know how it feels to be in the dark as to how they feel.
As long as you know that both of you want to arrange a third, it’s not worth stressing over how long it takes to arrange it.
If you both want it, I’m sure you’ll find a time and a place that works for the two of you sooner rather than later!
Image credits – Photo by Alan Quirvan on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.