If you went on a date and felt it went well, I bet you’re feeling like you’re on top of the world.
Even more so if he texted you that night to make sure you got home safely and said he also had a great time.
But if he texted after that first date but not since it’s going to leave you wondering where you stand.
Does he like you?
Will he say yes to a second date?
If you’ve found yourself in this situation, here are 10 things to consider if you want to go on a second date:
- He Texted After First Date But Not Since! 10 Reasons & What To Do Now
- 1. Text Him and See What’s Up
- 2. Revisit the Date in Your Head
- 3. Check out What He’s Up To on Social Media
- 4. Make Time for Some Self Care
- 5. Don’t Put Too Much Hope Into This Guy
- 6. Don’t Blame Yourself
- 7. Do Things to Take Your Mind Off Him
- 8. Get Some Unbiased Opinions from Close Friends
- 9. Draw a Line and Move On
- 10. Take Everything as A Learning Experience
He Texted After First Date But Not Since! 10 Reasons & What To Do Now
1. Text Him and See What’s Up
I’m sure you replied at the time and let him know you got home safe and thanked him for a great date, but have you texted him since?
Whether you have or not, if you’re waiting for him to text you the best way to put your mind at ease is to text him again.
Feel free to ask him where you both stand and if he wants to go out again.
It’s better to be direct if you don’t know where you stand. You might not hear back what you want, but it’s better than being uncertain.
2. Revisit the Date in Your Head
If you feel like the date went well I’m sure you’re buzzing and caught up in the moment.
But it’s worth taking a moment to go through the date in your head in a more objective way.
Was he engaging with you and interested in everything you had to say?
Was he saying encouraging things, smiling, etc?
These are all good signs that he’s interested in you.
On the other hand, if he seemed aloof or uninterested it might be a sign that he’s not interested in pursuing anything further.
3. Check out What He’s Up To on Social Media
There is nothing creepy or wrong about checking out what he’s up to on social media to see if he’s active while not replying to you.
In fact, if you’re interested in him it’s a good way to get to know him better.
There may be a perfectly reasonable explanation, such as you can see he’s away on holiday or his status says he’s busy studying and not returning messages.
On the other hand, if you can see in his timeline that he’s out partying and meeting other girls, I think you know why he hasn’t texted you.
4. Make Time for Some Self Care
This is something you should do regardless of whether he texts you or not.
But it’s worth mentioning because when you’re waiting for someone to text you it can be easy to forget to take care of yourself and let your anxieties build up.
Make sure you’re still doing the things you love and that make you happy.
And if you’re finding it hard to cope, don’t hesitate to reach out to a friend or family member for support.
5. Don’t Put Too Much Hope Into This Guy
I know it’s easy to do when you really like someone, but try not to put too much hope or importance into this one guy.
There are plenty of other fish in the sea and you don’t want to waste your time pining over someone who’s not interested or doesn’t have the courtesy to send you a message.
If he doesn’t text you, you need to prepare yourself to move on and find someone who will appreciate you.
6. Don’t Blame Yourself
This is another thing that’s easy to do, and I know a few female friends who have been guilty of this.
But it’s important to remember that if he doesn’t text you it’s not your fault.
You didn’t do anything wrong and there is nothing you could have done to prevent it.
The reason we go on dates is to see if we have a connection with someone, and it doesn’t always work out.
When one person feels that connection and the other doesn’t, obviously that’s tough – but it happens.
7. Do Things to Take Your Mind Off Him
Again, this is something you should do regardless of whether he texts you or not.
It’s important to find things that take your mind off this guy and from dwelling on whether or not he’s going to text you.
Focus on your hobbies, spend time with friends and family, read books, watch films – anything that makes you happy.
And before you know it, if he hasn’t texted you you’ll have forgotten all about him anyway!
8. Get Some Unbiased Opinions from Close Friends
If you’re really struggling to cope or just want some unbiased opinions, it can be helpful to talk to close friends about what’s going on.
They might be able to offer some insight or suggestions that you haven’t thought of.
And it can also be helpful just to have a good vent about how you’re feeling – it’s better out than in!
I’m sure your friends will tell you not to get hung up over this guy, and I bet you know that.
9. Draw a Line and Move On
I don’t know how long has passed, but there comes a point when you have to draw a line and tell yourself to move on.
It might be a week, it might be two weeks – but at some point you need to stop waiting around for him and take control of your own life.
You don’t want to be waiting around for him forever, and the sooner you start moving on the better.
It’s not easy to do, but it’s better you have options if he does end up contacting you anyway.
10. Take Everything as A Learning Experience
This is something I always try to do, and it’s helped me a lot in the past.
Whenever something bad happens or a situation doesn’t go the way I wanted, I try to take it as a learning experience.
So if this guy doesn’t text you, try to think about what you can learn from the situation.
Maybe you’ll not have such high hopes in the future or you’ll be more prepared for this outcome.
Whatever you draw from this experience, as long as you come out of it stronger and with a positive mindset, it’s a win.
It may not feel like it right now, but take it from me when I say that it is!
Image credits – Photo by Malte Helmhold on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.