Has your husband gained a lot of weight since you’ve been together and it’s now a huge turn-off for you?
First of all, don’t feel guilty or bad about it – you can’t help how you feel.
Secondly, don’t give up on your husband just yet, with a little communication and support I’m sure he’ll want to get back in shape and bring back that spark!
Why Some Guys Gain Weight While in a Relationship
The weight gain is what you see on the surface, but unless your husband identifies the root cause for his weight gain he’ll never find a reliable solution.
It may be due to reasons personal to your husband and your relationship. However, to help out, here are some of the most common reasons why married guys gain weight:
He’s Gained More Unhealthy Habits Over Time
Just like any other long-term relationship, when you’re married you tend to let some of your better habits slide.
He may have been really active and health-conscious when you first got together, but five years down the line things are different.
Maybe you don’t go on as many date nights or take as many weekend trips. Or maybe his gym membership expired and he just didn’t renew it.
It’s likely he needs a little jumpstart – as well do sometimes – to get back into a healthy lifestyle.
He Feels Like There Is No Need to Impress Anyone
In the early days of your relationship, your husband probably felt the need to look his best for you, especially when he was chasing you.
I bet you did, too, right?
But now that you’ve been married a while, he may feel like he doesn’t have to try as hard anymore.
This is perfectly normal and it’s something most people go through in a long-term relationship.
Maybe he needs a little reminder of why he tried so hard to get you and why he should feel lucky every day to have been the one who stole your heart!
It Gets a Little Hard to Keep Weight off as We Age
As we get older, it gets harder to keep the weight off.
This is due to a number of factors including slower metabolism, less muscle mass, and changes in hormones.
That’s why it’s important for your husband – and you! – to make sure you’re doing everything you can to stay healthy as you age.
This combined with some of the other reasons on this list can easily cause his weight to spiral out of control.
He’s Busier With Work and Life and Spends Less Time Exercising
As we get older and our lives get busier, it’s easy to let things like exercise fall by the wayside.
But if your husband is putting in long hours at work and then coming home to take care of the kids, when does he have time to work out?
It may be something he’s used to doing and enjoys, but with everything else going on it’s easy to see how his fitness routine could have fallen by the wayside.
You can help him out by helping him make time and encouraging him to work out – and even suggest you go to the gym together!
It’s Possible He’s Feeling Low or in a Rut and Comfort Eats
If your husband is in a low mood, he may be comfort eating without even realizing it.
We all do it to some extent – when we’re feeling down we tend to reach for unhealthy foods that make us feel better in the short term.
But if he’s doing it more often than not, it can lead to weight gain.
If you’re worried he may be comfort eating, have a chat with him and see if there’s anything going on that you can help with.
Losing Weight Will Take Time and Communication
First of all, if your husband has gained weight, it’s not going to come off overnight.
It will take time, patience, and a lot of hard work.
But it’s not impossible – and it’s definitely worth it!
If you want to help your husband lose weight, the most important thing you can do is be supportive.
Encourage him to make healthy choices and make sure you congratulate him as the lbs start dropping off.
The last thing you should do is fat shame him, blame him, or make him feel bad for gaining weight.
As I said above, the weight is just the manifestation of his underlying issues. If you help him correct those issues, the weight is going to come off and your husband is going to be much happier for it!
On a plus note, if your husband’s weight and how it makes you feel less attracted to him physically is all that’s causing a problem in your relationship – it’s not that hard to fix.
Plus, when your husband finds a groove with a new healthy routine and is seeing the effects on his body, his mood, and most importantly how you now find him irresistible, he’s probably going to end up in the best shape of his life!
The bottom line is that things change over the course of a long-term relationship, both physically and emotionally.
As long as you’re able to talk openly about these issues and work together to find a solution, there are no problems that are bigger than your marriage.
Image credits – Photo by AllGo – An App For Plus Size People
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.