If you’re married to an entrepreneur, I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how hard it can be at times.
Entrepreneurs operate outside of the ‘norm’ for the most part.
They break the working mold; they don’t work a 9-5, they often find it hard to detach from work, there will likely be extreme highs and lows – and that’s just scratching the surface.
Being married to an entrepreneur means you’re along for the ride – and it’s really hard at times for the spouse.
The worst part is that most entrepreneurs just don’t see how it’s affecting their partners.
Marriage.com estimates that the divorce rate for entrepreneurs is as much as 10% higher than the average and is close to 50%.
That’s staggering, it really is.
If you’re married to an entrepreneur and it’s taking a toll on your relationship, you’re not alone. More importantly, there is a lot you can do.
In this article, I’m going to explain why being married to an entrepreneur is so hard. As well as what you can do to help him appreciate you more and strengthen your relationship.
Why Are Entrepreneurs Bad in Relationships?
The stats back up what most of us know, entrepreneurs are not the best at forming and maintaining relationships.
The question, however, is “why?”
Well, if you look at all of the characteristics, personality traits, and qualities that make entrepreneurs successful in business – many of those traits are what make them bad in relationships.
Some of those traits I’m talking about are:
- Being easily distracted
- Having unpredictable moods
- Always being busy
- Finding it difficult to detach from work
As you can see, these don’t exactly fit the criteria someone looks for when ponding if someone is going to be good relationship material.
This doesn’t mean all entrepreneurs are bad in relationships though. Far from it, and being adaptable is a strength that helps a lot of entrepreneurs work on their relationships.
It’s being busy, both mentally and physically, always being wrapped up and focused on work, and being absent that are the main things causing issues in their relationships.
Related – Is your husband’s failing business ruining your marriage? Read this post!
How Can I Help an Entrepreneur Husband?
Relationships take work, anyone who has been married for any length of time will tell you that.
It’s knowing how to work with your husband to help him find time to also work on his relationship with you that is important.
Everyone is different and each relationship has its own challenges. But generally speaking, most wives of entrepreneurs need to:
Set aside time in their husband’s calendar – It sounds strange at first, booking slots in his calendar. But if this is the only way you can guarantee he’s going to spend quality time with you, this is what you’ll have to do.
Set some clear rules (no phones), and make sure he knows you want his attention. It’s not about trying to change or force your husband to switch off from work, but it is a way to guarantee you spend some quality time together.
Take an interest in their work – Entrepreneurs are proud of what they do, they’re on a pursuit very different from the regular 9-5.
It’s hard, almost impossible for them to switch off, and they’d love nothing more than to talk about their work with their partners.
I’m not suggesting you go all in and get involved in their work. But making yourself available to listen to how their day went is a great way to keep connected to your husband.
Let them know how you feel – Communication or lack thereof is one of the top reasons why relationships break up. Communication is even more important if you’re married to a busy entrepreneur.
You absolutely have to make time to talk about how you’re feeling about the relationship, ask your husband how he feels, and discuss things that are important to you both.
Related – A look at why most relationships fail.
The Challenges That Come With Being Married to an Entrepreneur
Here are some of the common challenges that most spouses married to entrepreneurs face:
You Feel Lonely
It’s difficult being with someone who works unconventional hours and never seems to disconnect from their work, you’re going to feel lonely at times.
Finding your own hobbies and building a strong network of friends and family is one way you can combat this.
But you’ll miss your husband, there’s no escaping that.
You Keep Getting Let Down
There are a few things worse in a relationship than being constantly let down by your husband.
Entrepreneurs often use their work as an excuse, saying it’s not as simple as having a 9-5, etc.
But this really isn’t a good excuse. One of the biggest challenges of dating or living with an entrepreneur it’s dealing with them putting work first.
He Puts Business Before Family
Tying in with being let down because your husband is busy is the fact that many entrepreneurs simply put business before family.
They’re working towards something big, we can all understand that.
But losing sight of what’s really important – you and other family members – is something many end up regretting.
It’s Hard to Communicate
As I touched on earlier, good communication is often the difference between success and failure in a relationship.
The challenges you face when trying to communicate with an entrepreneur are threefold.
You first need to get quality time with them, you then need their undivided attention, and you also need to continually work on your communication.
Being married to an entrepreneur presents some unique challenges.
Hopefully, you now know you’re not alone if you’re facing some of the challenges covered above.
I do have to point out – it’s not all bad, there are some pros to being married to an entrepreneur.
But there is no doubt that it’s more difficult than being married to someone with a more conventional lifestyle and job.
Communication is everything, just as it is in any relationship.
The challenge is finding the time – and being able to break through and connect on a deep level with an entrepreneur.
Image credits – Photo by Štefan Štefančík on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.