Awkwardness is one of the most difficult feelings to hide or control. I’m sure we’ve all had awkward social moments or situations with friends and family.
As tough or as embarrassing as those moments are, they pass and we can learn from them.
However, if you’re finding that you feel awkward around your husband, boyfriend, or any significant other all the time, this presents a bigger issue.
You shouldn’t be feeling awkward around someone as close to you as your partner. And, I’m sure you don’t want to be having these feelings.
So, the first step is to identify what’s causing these feelings and situations. Then, you can address the cause and – hopefully – resolve and put a stop to these feelings.
Here is a list of the most common causes for feeling awkward around a partner:
Why Do I Feel Awkward Around My Husband? 9 Reasons & What to Do
You Have Doubts About Your Relationship
If you’re having doubts about your relationship or questioning your feelings for your husband, it’s going to cause all kinds of emotions to stir up – and likely some awkwardness.
It often starts when people are growing apart. The more you feel like you’re not deeply connected or on the same page as your partner, the more awkward being around them can become.
He’s Socially Awkward
If he’s socially awkward, it’s going to make what you do feel more awkward. What you shouldn’t do is tiptoe around him and avoid the awkwardness, you need to address it.
It’s tough to talk about. Being awkward often goes hand in hand with being shy, or an unwillingness to work on one’s self. But it’s something you need to get into the open if it’s causing your awkwardness.
You’re Socially Awkward
It might be that you’re socially awkward or dealing with some social anxiety issues and this is also transferring to your home life.
Many of us feel overwhelmed in public or dealing with people for the first time. But we don’t expect to feel the same at home. I’ve seen it a number of times, however, you might need to work on your self-esteem and confidence.
You’re Lacking Self-Esteem
Self-esteem is the opinion we have of ourselves. It’s directly related to our mood, confidence, what we believe we can do, our emotions, and more.
When self-esteem is low, it can make dealing with people, even those close to us, a challenge. For some people it means avoiding their partner, not wanting to talk to them, and so on.
He’s Making You Feel Awkward
Is there a possibility that he’s making you feel awkward? Either deliberately, not just as a result of things he does?
Don’t rule this out just because you’ve only recently started feeling this way. People change, emotions and feelings change, you can start to feel like this with someone after knowing them for years.
I talked to a friend through a similar scenario earlier this year. She was feeling very awkward around her husband because he’d had a big promotion at work and started hanging out with a different crowd.
His attitude had changed. “He started thinking he was better than his old self,” she told me. My friend was feeling inadequate and awkward as a result.
Related – Does your husband pick on everything you do? Read this.
You Feel Threatened by Him
Does your husband have a temper? Is he prone to getting angry and has a short fuse?
Being around people with a short fuse causes those around them to act differently so they don’t trigger their temper.
This can result in you feeling or acting awkward. What is best to say, where do you put yourself…it’s horrible treading lightly around someone so you don’t set them off.
It’s Your Conscience Talking To You
Are you hiding something? Like a secret or something, you really want to bring up with your husband, but you can’t?
Only you’re going to know the answer to this – but I know this has been the cause for a number of other people I’ve worked with. Have you cheated on them? Or just had thoughts or been tempted to do so?
For some, this is all it takes to throw their emotions all out of whack and create an awkward situation. It’s called a conscience, your moral sense of right or wrong is telling you to come clean.
You Don’t Feel Good Enough for Him
This is similar to lacking self-esteem, but if it’s only your husband you feel awkward around it’s an indication that it’s him, in particular causing these emotions.
As I mentioned earlier, a friend of mine went through this earlier in the year when her husband got promoted and started mixing in new circles.
It can be hard to deal with such a drastic change. Especially if your husband has changed, hopefully it’s just an adjustment period and the man you married is still there when you look hard.
You’re Feeling Down
Have you been feeling down lately? Are things in your life a little rougher than normal? If so, these things might be manifesting as feeling awkward around your partner, especially if they’re riding a high.
It’s important you talk to them if this is the case. If you have a supportive and understanding husband, as I’m sure you do, they’ll do whatever they can to help.
How To Stop Feeling Awkward Around Your Husband
The key to stopping feeling awkward around your husband or partner is to first identify the root cause.
Hopefully, you will have identified the exact reason why you feel like this. If not, you should have at least narrowed it down from the points above.
Now you can work on resolving that cause. If you’re holding on to a secret, you may have to tell him what’s on your mind to free yourself – as hard as that may be.
Likewise, if you or he have social awkward or anxiety issues, this is something you will have to work together to overcome.
Whatever it is, if you’re committed to the relationship the important thing is that you’re open and honest with your husband.
As I mentioned earlier, it’s hard to confront the issues behind awkwardness. It’s something you have to do though, I hope you can find the right support you need.
Image credits – Photo by Charlie Foster on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.