Whether it’s a crush, a new boyfriend, or your husband – if he wants some space, time alone, or even to move on, you need to pick up on the signs.
There could be a number of reasons for your crush/partner wanting to be left alone:
- He might be depressed and need some alone time
- He might be over the relationship
- He might be going through some personal issues
The important thing is that you recognise he wants space, and give him that space so the issues don’t escalate.
Here are some of the signs to look for:
8 Signs He Wants You to Leave Him Alone
The Intimacy Is Gone
One of the most obvious signs a guy wants to be left alone is that he’s no longer interested in being intimate or physical with you – even if you’re initiating it.
Obviously, there could be a number of other reasons for this. But if this ties in with more of the signs I’m covering in this article, there is something seriously wrong with your relationship.
He’s Ignoring You – or Taking Ages to Reply
Excuses or not, we all know how easy it is to reply to someone quickly when we’re keen. If a man is taking longer to reply to your messages – or not replying at all – he wants space.
You can test this at any point, just text him and ask him something. Fire off an open-ended question that requires more than a “yes” or a “no” and see how long it takes him, and if he gives you more than a 1-word answer.
Related – 14 signs a man is done with a relationship.
He Seems Happier Hanging out With Other People
Is he miserable and withdrawn when he’s with you, only to be the life of the party when he’s hanging out with other people?
It’s the worst feeling, isn’t it? But it’s a clear sign that he’s not happy with you and he’s overcompensating when he’s around other people.
He’s Picking Fights With You
Has he been picking fights with you over nothing? Does it feel like he wants to fight with you just to have the excuse to storm out or give you the cold shoulder?
If he’s also criticizing you more these are two very bold signs that he wants time alone, but doesn’t have the courage to be up-front and honest with you about it.
He Keeps Making Plans Without You
Does he make plans without you, and not include you? Do you feel like you’re being left out and pushed away?
Worse, does he talk about a future without you? It’s normal to become less dependent on a partner the longer you’re together, but if he’s moved on mentally and starts making plans without you the writing is on the wall.
You Can “Feel” Something Isn’t Right
Call it “woman’s intuition” if you like. If something just doesn’t feel right in your gut, there’s a good chance that something is up.
Take a good look at the signs I’m covering in this article. More importantly, speak to him if you feel like this. The best chance of having him open up is by showing you’re vulnerable.
He’s Told You He Wants to Be Left Alone
This is the most obvious one, right? If he’s told you that he wants to be left alone, needs space, time alone etc, then he wants to be left alone.
The reason I’m pointing this out is because it’s common for someone not to hear it, or want to believe it. He may be saying it as a throwaway comment, or not being direct, but if those words leave his mouth listen to them.
You Think He’s Cheating or Has a Crush on Another Woman
This is the one that really hurts. If you think – or even know – your man has a crush on another woman or is cheating, he’s just looking for a cowardly way to get out of the relationship.
I say “cowardly” because the manly thing to do is to speak openly with you before getting involved with another woman. He’s going to use the time alone to figure out if he wants to be with this other person, or just not with you.
Should I Leave Him Alone or Keep Trying?
If your man is asking to be left alone it’s important you give him some time and space as he’s asking for.
Doing the opposite of what he’s asking is only going to annoy him and make him push back harder. He’ll feel smothered, pressured, and will end up leaving for longer, or even for good.
Respect his wishes. If you care about him, there is more you can do to repair your relationship by listening to what he’s telling you and working out your differences.
Will He Miss You If You Leave Him Alone?
This is a hard question to answer as everyone is different and their reasons for wanting to be alone are different.
The one thing I am sure of, however, is that he’s more likely to miss you and want you back if you give him the time alone he’s asking for.
If you try to hold onto a man and don’t leave him alone when he’s asking, you’re just going to push him away further. It’s tough, I know, but you have to respect his wishes.
In Summary
If it’s obvious that a man you’re interested in or in a relationship with wants you to leave him alone, you have to leave him alone.
It’s hard sometimes, and I know you’re afraid if you give him space you’ll lose him forever.
But it’s the risk you have to take, not picking up on the signs or listening to him is worse for your relationship in the long term.
Resources
Image credits – Photos used with permission from Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.
This is all true but I have one question.
How do you get him to talk about what he is going through so you can be with him every step of the way?