In this article, I’m going to run through 11 of the most common and obvious signs your coworker has feelings for you:
I’ve worked in a lot of places over the years and seen my fair share of office romances blossom.
I’ve witnessed everything from casual flirting to die-hard crushes. Seeing these subtle – or not so subtle – signs that someone has feelings for someone else is always interesting.
It’s incredibly common in the workplace, too. Let’s be honest, most of us spend more time with our coworkers than we do our other halves, as scary as that is to think about.
So, if you’re in the midst of trying to decipher signals you’re getting from a coworker, here are 11 signs your coworker has feelings for you:
1. They Go Out of Their Way To Greet You
As with most of the signs on this list, this one can be easily misinterpreted. Some people are just stickers for greeting people in a certain order.
However, if someone goes out of their way to greet you, it’s a sign they’re happy to see you and want you to acknowledge them.
Think of it from your perspective, how important is it for you to say “good morning” to a coworker when you’ve got a lot and it means going out of your way?
2. They Make Excuses To Talk To You
Leading on from the last point, one of the most obvious signs a coworker is interested in someone else is making excuses to talk to them.
That’s how you initiate contact with someone you’re interested in, right? It’s no different if you work together, although it may be a little more obvious if anything.
If it seems like someone is coming up with reasons or excuses to talk to you – that’s a pretty strong sign they want to get to know you better.
3. They Are Interested in Your Life Outside of Work
One of the biggest steps that take someone from being strictly a coworker to a friend or even a love interest, is finding out about that person outside of work.
They might even be fishing for information about your love life. Here’s the thing about someone who probes into your personal life – it’s a great way to get to know them too.
If they’re opening up conversations and you’re interested to know more about them, take their lead. You will also find out if they’re good listeners, which is obviously an important consideration in a friend/partner.
Related – 11 Signs co-workers are sleeping together.
4. They Offer To Help With Your Work
I don’t know what it’s like where you work, but in most of the places I’ve worked people were not lining up to help others.
If someone is going out of their way to help someone else, they have an agenda. It could be that they are making a power play or have career aspirations – or they could have a crush on you.
Pay attention to how they are offering to help you work. Is it to get near to you? Do they spend that time talking more about personal stuff than work?
5. They Make Physical Contact With You
I have to be careful mentioning this one – as does anyone deliberately making contact with a coworker – potential lawsuits and all.
Still, if someone is deliberately getting closer than they should, it’s a very strong sign that they’re interested in you.
Some people are driven physically much stronger than they are emotionally. If they find it hard to communicate openly they may just try getting close to you.
6. They Ask To Hang Out at Lunch Time
Ah, the lunch break hangout. It’s been the starting point for so many workplace romances. It’s that one time during the day when you can be alone with someone, laugh loudly, talk about what you want, and so on.
If someone asks you for lunch, they want to get to know you. How well do they want to get to know you? That’s for you to find out.
7. They Remember Things About You
There’s nothing cuter than a coworker remembering your birthday, to ask how your holiday was, bring up something you mentioned a long time ago…
If one coworker remembers something about you that no one else does, they either have an exceptional memory or they are very interested in you.
8. Other Coworkers Are Noticing They Like You
Some people are shy and may never be able to show you they have feelings for you. Instead, they might talk about you to other coworkers and make it obvious to them they like you.
That information will make its way back to you at some point. When it does, it may suddenly become very obvious that there have been small, subtle signals all along.
This is probably a sign that they’re never going to have the nerve to take it any further. If you’re interested, you will have to make a move.
9. They Make Any Excuse To Sit by You
Meetings, hot desks, working events, is there someone who always seems to end up sitting next to you?
If they’re shy, they might not even make a big deal out of it or talk to you. You’ll just notice they’re always there, and it’s not a coincidence.
10. They Suddenly Share Some of Your Interests
This is an age-old classic; if you like someone, drop into a conversation that you have some of the same interests as them – even if you don’t. (yet)
It’s a great conversation starter, breaks down all of those initial barriers, and will give you something to do together in the future. Unless they’re really stretching and pretending they are into something they can’t stand.
Still, that shows a level of commitment to getting to know you that you can’t fault.
11. They Ask You Out
OK, it doesn’t get much more obvious than this. But, believe it or not, some people still don’t get the message. They make up some excuse about, “oh, it’s innocent”, “they can’t be interested in me”, etc.
If a coworker asks you to meet outside of work, you know, in the evening for a “drink” they’re asking you out.
At this point, the guesswork and trying to decipher cues are over. Whether or not you accept is up to you, good luck!
Image credits – Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.