Respect is one of the most important things when it comes to friends.
If you don’t respect one another, it means you don’t trust, admire, care for, or appreciate each other.
If you don’t think your friends respect you, there will be telltale signs in their behavior towards you.
Here is a list of 20 signs your friends don’t respect you and what you should do about it:
20 Signs Your Friends Don’t Respect You
1. They Don’t Ask Your Opinion on Things
When you respect someone you value their opinions. Even if you don’t think they will know the answer to something, you want to hear what they have to say.
If your friends never ask you what you think about things, it’s a sign they don’t care about your opinion and don’t respect you.
Furthermore, if you interject your opinion and it’s always dismissed, this strongly indicates that they have no respect for you.
2. They Are Always Letting You Down
If your friends respect you they respect your time and would do everything in their power not to let you down.
If they are constantly canceling plans or not showing up when they say they will, it’s a sign they don’t respect you.
People who respect you will make an effort to show up or follow through on a promise, even if it means making sacrifices on their side.
3. They Don’t Take Things You Say Seriously
Another sign of disrespect is never taking things you say seriously, even if you’re clearly reaching out and trying to open up about something that means a lot to you.
This type of dismissive behavior will make you feel invalidated and unimportant.
If your friends regularly joke about things you say or dismiss your feelings, they clearly don’t have a lot of respect for you.
4. They Leave You out Of Group Events
It never feels good to be the one left out of group events. If this is happening to you on a regular basis, it’s a sign your friends don’t respect you.
If they respected you they would include you in things and make an effort to include you in social gatherings.
Furthermore, if they do invite you to things but always leave you out of the main conversation, this is also an indication that they don’t value you.
5. They Talk Over You
This one is rude, frustrating, and a huge red flag when it comes to looking at your friends and seeing how much they respect you.
If they constantly talk over you or interrupt you, it’s a sign they don’t think what you have to say is important or they want to impose themselves on you.
This type of behavior is always disrespectful and can make you feel like you’re not even there.
6. They Always Question and Doubt You
If your friends are always questioning or doubting what you say, it’s a sign they don’t take you seriously and respect your opinion.
This type of behavior can be really frustrating and make you feel like you can’t even speak up and share your opinion when you’re around them.
If your friends are constantly second-guessing you or saying you’re not telling the truth, it’s time to consider changing who you hang around with.
7. They Tell You How You Should Think and What You Should Do
Some people are just a bit pushy by nature, while others will tell you how they think you should act if they don’t respect you in particular.
If your friends are always trying to tell you what to do or how to think it shows they think they know better than you, and I’m sure you’ll agree that’s a pretty terrible feeling.
It’s time to tell them you don’t need to be told how to act and think and to earn some respect.
8. It’s Obvious They Don’t Trust You
Trust is everything in a relationship and friendship, if you don’t have trust it’s hard to argue that you have a basis for genuine friendship.
If your friends don’t trust you it’s also a sign they don’t respect you.
If they feel like they can’t confide in you or share secrets with you this is something you need to address and overcome if you want to move forward and form strong friendships.
9. They Talk Bad About You Behind Your Back
Finding out people you considered to be friends have been talking about you behind your back always feels bad.
If they’ve also been saying disrespectful or hurtful things, this is an even clearer sign that they don’t respect you.
If your friends can’t say anything nice about you to other people and are two-faced about it when they see you, it’s time to move on and find better friends.
10. They Don’t Value Your Time
This is a big one because time is our most precious resource.
If your friends don’t value your time and show this by always messing you around, letting you down, and giving you the runaround, there is a lack of respect there.
In addition to this, if your friends are precious about their time this double standard shows you that their priorities aren’t where they should be!
11. They Forget Things That Are Important to You
True friends remember those little things that are important to us like birthdays, our favorite films and bands, and how we like our coffee!
If your friends are forgetting things that matter to you it’s a sign they don’t really care and don’t respect you enough to make an effort to remember them.
12. They Have Shared Your Secrets and Private Things with Others
This one is a huge no-no and definitely a sign that your friends don’t respect you.
If they’ve shared something private about you that you told them in confidence, this is a huge breach of trust.
It’s also a sign that they don’t really care about how you feel and what you think, which is pretty disrespectful.
13. They Don’t Apologize to You when It’s Due
We all make mistakes, but what’s really telling is whether or not someone will apologize when it’s the right thing to do.
If your friends have breached your trust, offended you, or are clearly in the wrong in some other way and won’t apologize, this tells you they don’t respect you.
It might be hard, but it’s time to confront them about this and see if they’re willing to change their ways.
14. They Make Jokes and Embarrass You in Front of Other People
True friends don’t make hurtful jokes or say and do things that embarrass you in front of other people.
If your friends are doing this it’s a sign they don’t respect you and may even see you as a bit of a joke.
This goes a little further than just being disrespectful, this is a form of bullying and toxic behavior you need to distance yourself from.
15. They Turn Your Good News Into Something About Them
If you’re excited to share some good news or an achievement with your friends only to have them play it off and turn the conversation around to themselves, it doesn’t feel good.
This is a sign that they’re not really interested in you and your life, and don’t respect you enough to hear you out and show you the appreciation you deserve.
16. They Don’t Reply to You Over Urgent Matters
If you’ve tried to get in touch with your friends over something urgent and they don’t reply for ages, this is a sign that they don’t respect you.
Urgent matters could be anything from needing some advice to being stranded somewhere, and if they’re not replying this shows they think of themselves first and you second.
It’s another one of those signs that are tough to take because it’s a reminder that your friends aren’t going to be there when you really need them.
17. They Ditch You at Social Events when Someone Else Turns Up
I’ve been in this situation and know firsthand how much it hurts.
If you’re out mingling at a social event and your friends drift off to hang around with someone else and leave you hanging, this is a sign that they’re selfish and not thinking of you.
I hope you make the best of the situation and have a great night without them!
18. They Don’t Keep Their Promises to You
There are few feelings worse than realizing you’ve been let down, especially if a friend promised they’d do something for you.
If your friends are breaking their promises or not following through on their word, this shows they don’t respect you.
A promise should be a strong bond.
Sure, sometimes it’s unavoidable to let someone down, but if you can see they’ve not been making an effort, it’s time to stop making so much effort yourself.
19. You Know You Can’t Rely on Them for Anything
If you’ve come to the realization that you can’t rely on your friends for anything, it’s definitely a sign they don’t respect you.
Whether you need them for a shoulder to cry on, help with something important, or just a chat, if they’re not there for you it’s a sign that they don’t care.
It’s tough to come to terms with, but if your friends can’t be counted on then it might be time to find some new ones.
20. You Can Feel that They Don’t Respect You in Your Gut
This might be the most important sign and no matter how accurate it is, you need to listen to your gut.
You know deep down inside when someone doesn’t respect you, even if they’re good at hiding it.
If you have a nagging feeling that your friends don’t respect you, it’s probably because they don’t.
This feeling isn’t going to leave you unless you do something about it.
If you can just feel that your friends aren’t treating you the way you deserve, it’s time to confront the situation and figure out where things went wrong.
Image credits – Photo by Samsung Memory on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.