No one wants to be – or feel like they’re being – ghosted.
Especially not by a girl you like.
When someone just disappears with no reason or explanation, it always raises more questions than answers!
But sometimes people are just busy or they need space, and contacting them a lot might end up annoying them.
If you’re unsure contacting a girl or not, here are 10 ways you can tell if she is ghosting you or just busy:
Is She Ghosting Me or Just Busy? (10 Signs She’s Ghosting You!)
1. She Isn’t Responding to You at All
Someone doesn’t have to avoid you completely and not respond at all to be ghosting you, but it’s a sure sign they are!
Even if she was busy, she’d reply and let you know that she’ll get back to you later or something.
If you can’t get an answer out of her at all, she’s ghosting you and is not just too busy to reply.
2. You Can See She’s Active on Social Media
Social media has become one of the best modern ways of figuring out what someone is really doing, feeling, and up to.
If you can tell that she’s still active on her social media accounts, then chances are she’s not ghosting you.
It certainly sounds like she’s not too busy to do other things and update her social media!
3. She’s Been Talking to Other People You Know
If you can see – or hear – that she’s still socializing and talking to other people while not responding to you, then it’s likely she is ghosting you.
At the very least it seems like you’re not a priority in her life, which doesn’t feel good.
But in the technical sense of the term ‘ghosting’, it sounds like that’s exactly what she’s doing.
4. If She Does Reply She Takes Days
Someone doesn’t have to go complete radio silence on you to ghost you, they can gradually distance themselves.
If she’s taking longer and longer to reply to your messages, it could be an indication that she doesn’t want to talk to you as much and is slowly ghosting you.
You know her better than anyone, if she’s gone from being good and quick at communicating to bad, something is up.
5. Her Replies Are Dry and Short
If someone isn’t into you or they are ghosting you, their replies will usually be short and delivered without any emotion.
It’s a tell-tale sign they don’t want to talk to you and would like the conversation to end as soon as possible.
If her replies are always short or she’s ‘dry’ texting, it’s time for you to face up to the fact that she might be ghosting you.
6. She’s Been Canceling Plans with Poor Excuses
If the two of you keep making plans to meet up and she’s canceling them with poor excuses – it’s a sign.
Sure, it could be that she’s busy if she cancels one or two times.
But if she’s canceling to the point where the two of you never meet up, then it’s time for you to accept that she might be ghosting you.
7. She Has Blocked You on Social Media
Being blocked on social media is a pretty big sign that someone is trying to avoid or ghost you.
It’s a pretty drastic move, honestly, and it doesn’t leave much room for interpretation.
If she blocks you, then chances are she is ghosting you – the only question now is why!
8. You Saw Her in Public But She Avoided You
Ghosting over social media and text messages is one thing, but it becomes very real if she’s trying to avoid you in person.
If you’ve seen her from afar, been in the same room, or crossed paths in some way and she’s actively avoiding you, it’s a pretty big sign that something isn’t right.
9. Her Friends Are Making Excuses for Her
If you’ve noticed that her friends are suddenly making excuses for her when it comes to you, it’s time for the alarm bells to start ringing.
Her friends might be trying to protect her, but it’s also possible she has asked them to lie for her – which means she is ghosting you.
It’s fine to try and reach out via her friends if you’re finding it hard to contact her, but you need to read between the lines and take the hints that are there.
10. You Can Just Tell Based on Your History
There is something that often means more than all the signs and that’s the gut feeling you get deep down.
You know her and what kind of relationship you had, and it’s possible you can simply tell if she is ghosting you or not.
Trust your instincts, if it doesn’t feel right – then it probably isn’t.
How to Handle Being Ghosted
No matter how you look at it, being ghosted is never fun and it hurts.
It can be hard to accept and process it all, but the best thing you can do is take a step back and give yourself time to work through it.
Reach out to friends, family and trusted people in your life who will support you in this if you’re feeling frustrated and confused.
Most importantly, don’t blame yourself.
It’s not your fault that she ghosted you and the more time you give yourself to heal, the better you’ll feel in the end.
I know how badly you want to figure out why she’s ghosting you, that’s natural.
But the reality is that you’re going to need to give her time, the more you press her the more she’s going to retreat and ghost you.
So, take a step back, take a deep breath, focus on yourself for a while and give her the space she’s asking for.
Should You Keep Contacting Her?
Whether or not you keep reaching out to her completely depends on why she’s ghosting you.
If it seems like it might be a mistake or misunderstanding then the answer is yes, reach out one or two more times.
But if you think that she’s actively ghosting you and trying to end the relationship, then it’s best to back off and give her the space she’s asking for.
It’s never easy, but it’s often best to move on and find someone who will appreciate you for who you are.
You’ll just end up feeling like you’re banging your head against the wall and get more and more frustrated chasing someone who is ghosting you.
I’m sure you’ve made it clear you want to speak to her or what you want from your relationship, so the ball is in her court now!
Image credits – depositphotos.com/stock-photo-using-smart-phone
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.