Do you feel like you don’t fit into this world at times? Or maybe all the time?
First of all, I want you to know that you’re not alone, even though it may feel like it at times.
I went through a long period of feeling like I didn’t fit in and no one understood me.
I still feel like that sometimes, honestly.
I was able to figure out why I felt like I didn’t fit in, and I changed some things in my life that made a huge difference to how I feel.
I’m still fiercely independent, a bit different, quirky some say; but I’m comfortable in my own skin now – and it feels great!
“I Feel Like I Don’t Fit in This World” – 10 Common Reasons Why You Feel This Way!
1. You’re a Natural Introvert
It’s tough to feel like you fit in anywhere when you’re an introvert and can’t be around people for too long without feeling anxious and out of place.
I’m an introvert myself, and I know how hard it is to feel like you fit in when you’re constantly fighting the urge to just go hide away somewhere.
Related – Tips for dealing with people who just want to be left alone.
2. You Don’t Have a Good Support Network
Another reason why you might feel like you don’t fit in this world is because you don’t have a good support network.
Having good friends and people you can rely on is one of the most important things when it comes to feeling part of something, and confident with who you are.
3. You’re Trying Hard But Not Getting Anywhere
If you’re trying really hard to fit in and it’s just not happening, it can be really disheartening.
It might feel like you’re banging your head against a brick wall and you’ll never fit in – but this isn’t the case.
It simply means you haven’t found the right place or directed your energy in the right way.
4. You Have Unrealistic Goals
Another common reason people often feel like they don’t fit in is because their goals are unrealistic.
If you’re constantly comparing yourself to others or setting goals that are too difficult or will take much longer, it’s going to damage your motivation.
5. You’ve Moved Locations a Lot
Moving location and trying to settle into new places can make you feel like you don’t fit in.
It can be really tough to make friends and feel like part of the community when you’re always the new person.
6. Your Friends Don’t Listen or Understand You
If your friends don’t listen or understand you, it can make you feel pretty isolated.
You might not feel like you can’t talk to them about things that are important to you, and that will make you feel isolated.
7. You’re Too Concerned With What Others Think
If you’re too worried about what others think of you, it’s going to be difficult to be yourself and fit in.
It’s hard, but you need to accept yourself for who you are, your differences and all, and not care about what others think.
8. You Have Different Beliefs from Your Social Group
If you have different beliefs from your social group, it’s going to make it difficult for you to fit in.
This is why the people you surround yourself with are crucial to how comfortable you feel.
On a broader picture, it’s bad for your mental health to be around a social group where you don’t fit in – so you should do something about it.
9. You Don’t Connect with Your Parents
Having a good connection with our parents or caregivers is crucial to our development.
If you don’t feel close to your parents or they don’t understand you, it can make you feel like you’re the black sheep and you don’t fit in.
Our family represents our closest support network and it’s where we look to see who we are and where we come from.
10. You’re Shy and Self-Conscious
Finally, another reason why you might feel like you don’t fit in is because you’re shy and/or self-conscious.
When you’re constantly worrying about what others think of you and how you come across, it’s going to be difficult to let your guard down and relax and feel like you belong.
Related – Here is why being left alone can sometimes be a good thing.
10 Ways You Can Make Lifestyle Changes so You Feel Like You Fit in Better
1. Seek out People with Similar Interests and Beliefs as You
One of the best things you can do if you feel like you don’t fit in is to seek out people with similar interests and beliefs as you.
It’s so much easier to feel like you’re part of something when you have things in common with the people around you.
2. Work on Your Self-Esteem
If you don’t feel good about yourself, it’s going to be difficult to feel like you fit in.
Working on your self-esteem can be a complex process, but it’s so worth it when you start to see changes in how you feel about yourself.
3. Set Goals and Plan how You’ll Achieve Them
If you’re feeling lost and like you don’t fit in, setting some goals can be a great way to give yourself a sense of purpose and direction.
Planning how you’ll achieve these goals is also important so that you don’t get overwhelmed or discouraged.
Make sure you set small achievable goals and check them off one at a time while working towards bigger goals.
4. Start Meditating
Meditating turned my life around, so I can’t speak highly enough about meditating or practicing mindfulness daily.
Mindfulness has been shown to be incredibly effective in treating anxiety and depression, two conditions that can make you feel like you don’t fit in.
It also helps you train yourself to think more positively and to focus on the present moment instead of ruminating on past failures or worrying about the future.
5. Learn to Value Yourself for Who You Are
One of the most important things you can do if you want to feel like you fit in is to learn to value yourself for who you are.
This doesn’t mean you’ll be able to suddenly fit in with a particular group or setting, but it does mean that you’ll stop putting so much importance on fitting in and will be more content with being yourself.
6. Be Mindful of Social Norms
There’s no point in trying to fit in if it means compromising who you are, but at the same time, there’s nothing wrong with being aware of social norms so that you can avoid feeling out of place.
For example, if you’re introverted, you might want to avoid going to loud and crowded places where you’ll feel overwhelmed and uncomfortable.
It’s about being aware of where you can fit in best while taking steps to be more comfortable being yourself.
7. Join More Social Clubs
There are a bunch of reasons why it’s good to join local clubs and get involved with activities outside of just doing something fun.
You’ll meet loads of new people and learn more about your local community and get a much better feel for how well you fit in.
You’ll certainly increase the chance of meeting people that you connect with, and that’s always a good thing.
8. Start Learning a New Skill
Learning a new skill can make you feel more confident and give you a sense of accomplishment.
It can also help you connect with others who have similar interests.
And, no matter how unique or niche your interests are, I bet you’ll find others who have the same interests once you immerse yourself in the scene.
9. Surround Yourself With The Right People
I can’t emphasize how important it is that you surround yourself with the right people when you don’t feel like you fit into this world.
Good people who appreciate you for who you are, don’t judge you and want to get to know you better will make all the difference in how you feel.
Conversely, if you’re constantly around people who put you down or make you feel bad about yourself, it’s going to be very difficult for you to ever feel like you fit into this world.
10. Develop Connections with Your Parents or Older Figures
This is particularly important for adolescents or young adults, but even if you’re an adult, developing connections with your parents or other older figures can help you get a better understanding of where you come from and who you are.
Parents can also offer guidance and support, and older figures can provide valuable life experiences that can help you feel more grounded.
If you’re feeling like you don’t fit in this world, it’s important to take some time to figure out why you feel like this.
There is a place for you in this world, and you have something special to offer to the rest of us – and that’s you, because you’re unique.
There is always a solution and a way to find out where you fit into this world, so never give up and always keep searching!
Image credits – depositphotos.com/free-stock-photo-pensive-young-man-standing-crossed
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.