Going out on a date and having an awesome time will leave you feeling like you’re on top of the world.
But when it comes to asking for a second date, it’s funny how that confidence is swapped for anxiety!
After you’ve given it some time so you don’t seem too desperate, dropping a text is the best way to ask someone out for a second date.
To help you out, here are some tips and examples of how to ask for a second date by text message:
How to Ask for a Second Date by Text
Tell Them You Had a Great Time After the Date
Before asking for a second date, first you should send them a text after your first date letting them know you had a good time.
Keep it lighthearted, you’re not looking to get into an ongoing conversation all night.
It’s good date etiquette to drop a text and make sure your date got home safe, so that’s something you can do along with letting them know you had a great night.
Whatever you want to say, just keep it brief and thank them for an awesome date.
Wait a Day or Two to Ask Them out For a Second Date
When you do want to ask them out for a second date, as hard as it is to wait a couple of days – it’s really best if you do wait.
You don’t want to come across as desperate or make them feel like they’re under pressure to go out again.
If they’re interested in you, they’ll be happy to hear from you!
A couple of days might feel like a lifetime when you’re desperate to see them again, but it’s really not very long!
Keep It Short and Direct
When you are asking someone out for a second date, you don’t want to beat around the bush or send them a message that makes them wonder if you’re asking them out or not.
Get straight to the point and let them know that you had an awesome time and you’d love to meet up again.
If you’re feeling anxious about being let down, don’t. We all feel like this, but you’re never going to know unless you ask.
Examples of What to Say When Asking for A Second Date
If you’re not sure what to say, here are some examples you should be able to use with a little tweaking to suit your circumstances:
- “I had such a good time on our date I’ve not been able to stop thinking about you. I’d love to see you again soon if you’re up for it?”
- “I know we only just went out the other night, but I’m already missing your company. Shall we meet up again this week?”
- “Hey! Thanks again for a great date on Saturday. I’d love to do something similar again if you’re free this week/weekend?”
- “I know we’ve only had our first date but I felt a connection with you and would love to meet up again. Let me know if you’re free and I’ll think of somewhere fun!”
- “I’m still buzzing from our date, I have ideas for where we can go for a second date if you’re up for it.”
- “Hey, how’s your day going? I’m free this weekend if you are and you’d like to meet up again (here’s hoping!)”
How Do You Make Them Ask for A Second Date?
If you’re too nervous to ask for a second date or just can’t do it for some reason, you could try and get your date to ask you.
Some of the ways you can do this are:
- Make sure you text them after your date and let them know you had a great time. This will plant the seed that you’d like to see them again, so if you wait they might ask you.
- Flirt with them over text message. If you’re flirting then you’re going to build up the tension and their desire to see you, this is almost certainly going to get them to ask you out.
- Drop hints that you’d like to see them again without being too forward. You could text something like, “I had a great night, wouldn’t hesitate to do it again.”
- Tell them about a fun activity or event happening that you’d love to do with them or that you’re going to. For example, mention you’re going to see a band, a festival, or just going to be in the area where they live.
- Ask them general questions about themselves or their life that shows you’re interested in getting to know them better. If you don’t want to flirt, just get to know them better and see where the conversation goes.
Should You Ask Again if Your First Request Is Rejected?
If you are rejected when you ask for a second date, it doesn’t mean you’ll never see them again – unless you explicitly say so.
Sometimes people will not say yes because they are busy, unsure if they want to meet again, nervous themselves, or for a number of other reasons.
The key is to listen to what they say and respect their wishes.
If they say they don’t want to meet again because they feel like things didn’t go as well as you did, you just have to accept that.
However, if they reply saying they’re busy or they’ll get back to you, you don’t have to take that as a straight up no.
It’s up to you to read between the lines a little and understand whether or not it’s a good idea to ask them out again after a few more days have passed.
The important thing is that you do ask someone out again if you had a great time and really like them.
Too many people let an opportunity pass them by because they’re too nervous or afraid of being rejected.
Never be afraid of rejection.
I believe it was Wayne Gretzky that famously said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”
I love this quote, this is true in so many aspects of life and situations you’ll find yourself in!
Image credits – Photo by Malte Helmhold on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.