In this article, I’m going to cover 5 subtle signs that you’re being cheated on.
If you have a gut feeling – or maybe you’ve found some evidence – that your partner is cheating, you’re right to look into it.
Otherwise, it’s just going to eat away at you.
Sometimes, the most subtle signs are the most obvious once you uncover them.
So, while I’m hoping for the best outcome for you, here are 5 subtle signs you’re being cheated on:
5 Subtle Signs You’re Being Cheated On
1. They Are Always Talking to Someone You’ve Never Met
This is the subtle sign that a friend of mine picked up on last year, and it turned out to be the thing that unraveled the web of lies her partner was hiding.
He was always talking to someone, both by text and taking calls, and gave them a male name.
But she suspected something was up as she had never met the person, heard their voice, and he was being secretive about what was on his phone.
It’s normal not to meet coworkers, at least not in the short term.
But it’s not normal to never meet someone that is so important to your partner that they’re always speaking to them.
What you should do:
You could ask to meet the person. If they’re that good a friend of your partner they should want to meet you, as your partner should also want you to meet them.
See what they say!
Related – Reasons why cheating spouses stay married and how to get over your husband cheating on you.
2. They Keep Asking You How You Feel Your Relationship Is Going
If your partner keeps asking you how your relationship is going, or how they can make it better, they could be trying to find out if you have any suspicions.
This happened to another friend of mine who had been with her partner for a few years.
He kept asking her how she felt about the relationship and what he could do to make it better.
She thought he was being sweet and caring, but it turns out he was just trying to gauge her feelings towards him and find a way out of the relationship.
What you should do:
Try asking them how they feel about the relationship and see what they say.
If they’re cheating, they’re likely to try and deflect the question back onto you, try and make up problems that aren’t there, or will just give off the feeling like they have something to say.
3. Their Working Schedule or Going out Habits Have Changed a Lot
If your partner’s working schedule or going out habits have changed a lot recently, it could be because they’re trying to create more time to see the person they’re cheating on you with.
Emotional cheating is a very real problem, and it’s possible they’re doing this over text, social media, or if they work together.
But physical cheating requires time alone with the other person, and that has to be happening when your partner is away from home.
What you should do:
No one wants to be checking up on their partner, it never feels good to do.
But if you suspect they are not being truthful about where they’re going, you should do a little private eye work to either confirm or deny what you suspect.
You could quiz them, or even follow them if you want to see what they’re doing with your own eyes.
4. They Keep Stumbling Over the Excuses and Stories They Give You
If your partner is cheating on you, they’re going to have to come up with a lot of excuses and stories for their behaviors and whereabouts.
It’s not easy making excuses for going out all the time, especially when they’re trying to cover their tracks and stop you from finding out the truth.
Eventually, they’re going to start forgetting what they’ve told you and get their stories mixed up.
This is one of the classic ways cheaters get exposed, yet it can also go under the radar for years and is often a subtle way cheaters get found out.
What you should do:
You don’t have to start going all super-sleuth or PI, but it’s a good idea to start writing down the things they’re telling you.
It’s also common for cheaters to try and gaslight their partners. They might tell you you’ve remembered something wrong or that it didn’t happen.
If you note down where your partner said they went on what days, you can refer back to that when you think they’re getting their stories mixed up!
5. They’re Making More Effort in Their Appearance
If your partner is making more of an effort in their appearance and they’ve never really done that before, it could be because they’re trying to impress someone.
They might start dressing nicer, going to the gym more, or even get a tattoo or a piercing out of the blue.
This is usually a subtle sign that they’re trying to impress someone else, not you – which I’m sure they’re saying it is.
It’s hurtful to think that our partners are excited and making an effort for someone else, and it’s something I think a lot of people try to put to the back of their minds.
But if you’re already suspicious of your partner’s behavior, this is a subtle thing that you absolutely should take into consideration.
What you should do:
If you can clearly see your partner is making more effort or changing his appearance, it’s time to start asking more questions.
Not just to him, but if there are any other subtle – or not so subtle – signs that you’re being cheated on, you need to start looking at the situation as a whole and make a decision from there.
Related – Tips to get your spouse to come clean about cheating!
Can You Tell if Someone Is Cheating on You?
If you think your partner might be cheating on you, it’s important to trust your instincts.
There’s usually a reason why we feel the way we do, even if we can’t quite put our finger on it.
But if you’re not sure and want to know for certain, there will always be signs and clues if you look hard enough.
It’s not fun checking up on our partners, but if you have a gut feeling that they are cheating you’re within your rights to do some digging.
If they are, I’m sure you’ll start to find clues or subtle signs that will then unravel to reveal what – if anything – is going on!
Few people can cover their tracks. The main reason why most cheating spouses or partners get away with it is because their partners simply don’t suspect anything.
What Are Physical Signs of Cheating?
There are a few physical signs that could suggest your partner is cheating on you.
If they’re suddenly dressing nicer, working out more, or have started wearing more cologne, it might be because they’re trying to impress someone else.
You may also notice scratch marks if they’ve been intimate, or they’ll blush if you ask them certain, awkward questions.
There might also be changes in their personality and behavior.
If they’re suddenly into hobbies they never previously had an interest in, maybe they’re trying to fit in with a new crowd or someone in particular.
Ultimately, if your partner is acting very differently, you’ll notice it.
There will be a reason. I really hope that it’s not that they are cheating on you, but if you’re spotting some of the other subtle signs it’s time to start taking notice.
Image credits – Photo by Krys Amon on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.