Will my affair partner come back if I contact them or give them the silent treatment?
This isn’t something I can answer for you, but I can tell you the signs to look for that suggest your affair partner misses you!
Here are 10 signs that your ex-affair partner is missing you that may mean the door is open if you wanted to reconnect with them:
Will My Affair Partner Come Back? 10 Signs They’re Missing You
1. They’re Keeping Tabs on You via Social Media
If your ex-affair partner is viewing all of your social media posts, liking, and commenting, it’s a sign they’re still interested in you.
They may be hoping to see that you’re not doing well without them or looking for signs that you’ve moved on.
Either way, it’s a clear indication that they’re not over you yet!
Even if you’re friends, they should be keeping their distance if you ended your affair and are working on moving on.
Related – How likely is it that an affair will start up again?
2. They Initiate Contact with You
This is one of the most obvious signs that someone is missing someone else, no matter if it’s an ex-affair partner or just a friend.
If they’re always initiating contact with you, it’s a sign they want to hear from you and are constantly thinking about you
It could be as simple as a text message checking in on you or as severe as calls all throughout the night, they’re missing you for sure.
3. They’re Asking Your Friends how You’re Doing
If they’re not able to contact you directly (or don’t want to come across as they’re missing you!) they might ask your friends about you as an indirect way of finding out what you’re up to.
It’s a bit of mind games because they know your friends will report back to you – and that’s probably what they want.
It’s a strong sign that they’re missing you and it’s a way they can keep tabs on you without having to contact you directly.
4. They Keep Turning up Where You Are
This is a bit of a stalker-ish sign, but if they keep showing up where you are it’s because they want to see you.
It could be that they miss you and want to run into you by chance or it could be that they’re trying to gauge your reaction to seeing them.
If they keep turning up where you are, it’s a sign they’re not over you yet and either want you back or would come back to you if you asked them.
5. They’ve Asked You if You Regret Ending the Affair
No matter how amicable the split was at the time or whether it was their idea or not, if they’re now asking you if you regret the affair ending it means they’re having second thoughts.
It’s a sign that they miss you and are wondering if they made a mistake in ending things.
This is a big sign that they would come back to you if you asked them!
6. They Left Their Partner After You Ended Your Affair
If you both ended your affair to repair your relationships with your partners but your mistress/ex-affair partner is now single while you’re still working on your relationship, this is a sign that they’re going in a different direction.
It sounds like they realized they don’t want to carry on with their relationship, which in part will be due to the affair you two had.
It’s a very real possibility that they would take you back if they’re missing what they had while they were with you.
7. They Ask if You’re Missing Them
When an ex asks if you’re missing them, whether they were an affair partner or just a regular ex, they’re really telling you that they miss you.
It’s their way of opening the door to see if you might want to get back together.
If they are asking if you’re missing them, it means they’re most likely missing you too, and would come back if you asked them.
8. They Keep Bringing up The Good Times You Had
This is another way your ex-affair partner will try to stir up emotions for you without coming out and saying that they want you back.
Maybe they bring up all the happy times you had together, good memories of your affair, and things you said in the heat of the moment, all in an attempt to make you miss them.
It’s a way of trying to make you realize what you had together and how good it was, in hopes that you’ll want to get back together.
9. They Told You They’ll Always Love You
If your ex-affair partner has told you they will always love you since you’ve ended things, this isn’t something to take lightly.
It’s a sign that they know they’ll never get over you and what you had together was something special.
This is probably one of the most significant signs that they will come back to you if you let them.
10. You Can Just Feel It!
This is the most important sign of all that your affair partner would come back – if you just have a gut feeling that they would come back to you, you’re probably right.
You know them better than anyone, and you shared something special with them, even if it was an affair that you had to keep secret and now carry some shame or guilt for.
You have a connection with them that nobody else has, so if you feel in your heart that they would come back to you, chances are they would!
Related – Here is why extramarital affairs often turn into real love.
Should You Go Back to Your Affair Partner?
If you’re wondering if you should go back to your affair partner – or have them come back to you – that’s a decision only you can make.
There are many variables to consider, such as why you had an affair in the first place and how it felt, as well as how it ended and where you both are in life now.
You also have to consider your current relationship, if you’re still in one, and how it would affect things if you got back together with your affair partner.
There’s a lot to think about, but if you’re still struggling to make a decision, here are some questions to ask yourself that might help:
- Will getting back together with my affair partner truly make me happy?
- Do I want to try and repair things with my current partner?
- Can I handle it if my affair partner doesn’t want to come back?
- What are my reasons for wanting to get back together with my affair partner?
- What is the best-case scenario I’m hoping for by getting back with my affair partner?
Only you can answer these questions, but they might help you to make a decision about whether or not getting back together with your affair partner is the right choice for you.
Image credits – Photo by Arif Riyanto on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.