Does your wife threaten divorce every argument?
It’s horrible to hear a spouse say they want a divorce, especially over every little disagreement and argument.
Many spouses use this as a way to get their own way in an argument, but it’s a form of psychological abuse and is a toxic behavior.
Here is some advice on how to help your wife see that she shouldn’t threaten you with a divorce every time you argue!
Reasons Why a Spouse Threatens Divorce While Arguing
If your wife is bringing up that dreaded D-word, ‘divorce’, it’s important you get a better understanding of why she brings it up.
Some of the most common reasons why your wife might threaten divorce every time you argue include:
- She may be genuinely unhappy in the marriage and is using this as a way to get out.
- She’s trying to control or manipulate you into doing what she wants.
- She is looking for attention and finding it difficult to communicate her feelings so she says something to shock you.
- She is acting out while tempers are high and just saying anything she can to hurt you.
As you can see, there are no positives to saying something as negative as saying she wants to divorce you.
It’s hard to hear, even in the heat of the moment while you’re arguing – but it’s important to keep in mind that we all say things we don’t mean when we’re angry.
Even if you think she means it, or if she says she means it, it’s important you only discuss this or make decisions when you’re both calm.
How Threatening Divorce Impacts a Marriage
When a wife or spouse threatens divorce every time they are in an argument, it’s not only incredibly hurtful – but it also takes a toll on the marriage.
It creates an environment of mistrust, fear, and insecurity.
If your wife is constantly threatening to leave you, it will make you feel like she doesn’t love you, like you’re in the wrong, and will make you tread on eggshells.
If you’ve started to doubt yourself and your decisions, that’s perfectly normal.
Every time you argue, you’ll be worried that this is the end of your marriage – which takes a toll on your mental health.
You might start to resent your wife for always threatening to leave, and this will only lead to more arguments.
It’s a toxic cycle that can quickly spiral out of control.
If you’re constantly living in fear that your next argument could be your last and you can no longer speak openly with your wife, it’s time to seek help.
What Do You Do if Your Wife Keeps Threatening Divorce?
If you’re struggling in your marriage and your wife is threatening divorce every time you argue, it’s important you speak to her about this when she’s calm.
Communication is always the best way – and sometimes the only way – to get to the bottom of marital issues, especially something like this.
If you can’t speak to her about it yourself, don’t be afraid to seek professional help.
A therapist or counselor can help you communicate effectively with your wife and help you work through any underlying issues.
If your wife is constantly threatening divorce, it’s important to understand why she’s doing it and how it’s impacting your marriage.
It’s not a healthy behavior, and it will only lead to more problems down the road.
How Should You Respond to Divorce Threats?
In the heat of the moment, you shouldn’t say anything. It’s tempting to address it the moment she says it, but this is the worst time.
You’ll both be emotional, and anything you say will likely be said in anger.
This is a conversation you need to have when you’re both calm.
If your wife has threatened divorce many times before, it’s important to understand why she’s doing it and how it impacts your marriage.
You’re only going to be able to find out if she’s willing to talk to you when she has a clear head.
You might not hear what you want to hear, but it’s important that you encourage her to tell you the truth about how she feels about your marriage.
If you’re arguing a lot, this is obviously a sign that there is some friction in the marriage and this needs to be addressed at the very least.
Don’t Put up With Toxic Behaviors and Emotional Abuse
When a spouse constantly threatens to split or break up, take a break, or divorce their partner, it’s a form of emotional and psychological abuse.
One thing we do know about toxic behaviors like this is that they will take a toll on your mental and physical well-being over time.
Which I’m sure you’re already well aware of by how you feel when your wife makes these threats.
It’s important that you don’t suffer in silence or internalize how this makes you feel.
Please, either reach out to friends and family or seek professional help.
The Crisis Text Line is a great place to start. They provide text numbers you can use at any time to ask for advice and seek support from volunteer Crisis Counselors.
Image credits – Photo by Ashley Byrd on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.