Does your husband ignore you when he’s mad, in a mood, or for reasons you don’t even understand?
There is nothing nice about being ignored. Personally, I understand that a little time is needed sometimes, but I really don’t see why anyone should ignore someone else.
Let’s be real here, it’s immature, it doesn’t help resolve the underlying issue, it’s more likely to escalate the situation than it is helpful, and it’s rude for want of a better word.
Sometimes, the best thing to do when your husband or partner is ignoring you is to simply ignore them back.
Sounds like you’re just being as bad as they are, but it’s not that.
Someone often ignores someone else as a way of gaining power over the situation. They want to make you come to them to break the silence, choose when they want to talk about what’s on their mind, or are they just doing it because they know it’s annoying you.
If you’re sick of being the one chasing your husband and trying to break his silence, read on for tips on how to ignore a husband who ignores you:
Give Him the Silent Treatment Back
When your husband is ignoring you, the first thing that comes to mind is to talk to him to find out why he’s ignoring you, right?
Or, maybe you just want to get back to talking so he’s not ignoring you. No one likes being on the receiving end of silent treatment. It creates an awkward environment and you never really know what to do.
But, the interesting thing is that when your husband is ignoring you he doesn’t want to be ignored back. He wants you to come crawling or to start talking to you when it’s on his terms.
Ignoring him back is exactly what he doesn’t want you to do. It’s not so much about ‘getting even’, it’s more so about taking back some of the power.
If you have a particularly stubborn husband, obviously this could turn into a long standoff so you’ll have to see how it goes. It’s certainly worth doing if you’ve never tried this tactic though, might give him the wake-up call he needs to stop ignoring you.
Go About Your Business Like Nothing Is Up
One way to ignore the fact that your husband is ignoring you is to simply act like he’s not ignoring you.
Obviously, you can’t just talk to him and expect him to answer you – because he’s not going to. But you can just go about your day as if nothing is up.
If you have something to tell him, just tell him and move on. It’s not the reaction he wants, he wants you to be ignored or upset, so seeing you unaffected by his behavior is going to annoy him.
It might also make your husband realize that you’re not going to react to him and ignoring you is pointless. Hopefully, it’ll make him think twice about giving you the silent treatment in the future.
Go Out and Have Fun
What better way to ignore your husband’s behavior and show him that you aren’t bothered then to go out and have fun with friends while he’s at home sulking.
There are few things more frustrating for someone doing the ignoring than to see not only it’s not getting the desired reaction, but that person (you) are going out and having fun.
I’m not suggesting you go over the top and rub it in his face. I’m not into trying to get ‘even’ or escalate any such situations. But, at the same time, you shouldn’t be down about him ignoring you.
Go out and distance yourself from a negative situation. Have some fun with friends, and see if he wants to talk when you’re back and he’s had some time to think about what good comes from ignoring you.
Focus on Yourself
So, your husband, boyfriend, or partner is ignoring you – good for them. This is the perfect time to spend some time ignoring what they’re doing and focusing on yourself.
Do you meditate or practice mindfulness? If not, now is the perfect time to start. Why? Well, first of all, you’re not going to be disturbed!
Secondly, meditation and mindfulness are great for reducing anxiety and stress, promoting emotional and physical health, and helping you generally become a better you.
I always recommend meditation to everyone. If you’re dealing with a husband who likes to ignore you, you may find it even more beneficial.
Reasons Why a Husband Ignores a Wife (Or Any Partner in a Relationship)
If your husband stops talking to you when something is bothering him, it helps a lot if you can narrow down exactly why he behaves like that.
Some of the common reasons why people choose to take this route are:
He Doesn’t Know How to Express Himself
If he’s upset or angry, it’s possible he just doesn’t know how to talk to you. This isn’t uncommon for men, and they’ll usually just shut down and go with the silent treatment.
Obviously, we know this isn’t helping the situation. I hope you can help him find ways to communicate how he’s feeling over time. You’ll both benefit if he can speak openly when he’s frustrated and skip the silent treatment.
It always feels bad to say this, especially if he’s mature in many other ways – but if a guy chooses to ignore you over talking about the problem, it’s a sign of emotional immaturity.
This is often a deep-rooted behavior that’s hard to change. Hopefully, he is willing to change over time though. It’s not ideal trying to deal with a loved one acting like a moody teenager.
He’s Used to Getting His Way Behaving Like This
If your husband has gotten what he wants by ignoring you or someone else before, then he’s naturally going to go back to doing it to get his own way.
As an emotionally immature behavior, it’s often something he did growing up – or saw other people in his household doing it.
This is why it’s important not to react in the way he wants. Rather, by ignoring him back or doing some of the things I covered above, you’ll make him realize he doesn’t get what he wants by ignoring you.
Related – Does your husband hide your belongings? Here’s why.
If your husband ignores you – you now know how to ignore him back and not act how he expects or wants you to.
The bottom line, however, is that it’s not healthy for a marriage for one or either of you to be ignoring the other. Like I said above, I understand that we all need alone time sometimes, or we deal with problems in our own ways.
But communication is the key to resolving any issue. It really is.
If you can help your husband get a step closer to talking about his problems instead of sulking and ignoring you, you’ll both be better for it.
Image credits – Photos by Casper Nichols and Andrew Neel on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.