Ever seen someone you know who is in a relationship on a dating site while you’re browsing profiles?
Maybe you know a guy is on a dating site, but you know his partner and are wondering what’s up?
There could be any number of reasons why he’s on a dating site, some innocent (but most not!)
Here are 20 reasons why men who are in relationships go on dating sites:
- Why Do Men in Relationships Go On Dating Sites? (20 Common Reasons!)
- 1. He May Be Unhappy with His Current Relationship and Seeking a Way Out
- 2. He May Be Seeking Attention or Validation from Other Women
- 3. He May Be Struggling with Feelings of Loneliness or Isolation
- 4. He May Be Curious About What Else Is out There and Want to Explore His Options
- 5. He May Be Seeking a Way to Cheat on His Partner without Getting Caught
- 6. He May Be Going Through a Midlife Crisis
- 7. He Has only Ever Had One Relationship
- 8. He’s Looking for Someone Else with The Same Interests
- 9. He May Be Trying to Get Revenge for His Partner Cheating on Him
- 10. He May Be Looking to Meet New People, Regardless of The Possibility of A Romantic Relationship
- 11. He May Be Struggling with A Lack of Intimacy in His Current Relationship
- 12. He May Be Feeling Neglected or Undervalued in His Current Relationship
- 13. He May Be Going Through a Difficult Time in His Life and Seeking Support or Companionship from Others
- 14. He May Be Seeking New Experiences or Adventures that He Feels His Current Relationship Is Lacking
- 15. He May Be Seeing If He Can Find His Friends or Even His Girlfriend/Wife on There!
- 16. A Scammer Might Have Stolen His Images/Profile
- 17. He May Have Forgotten He Has a Dating Profile Set Up!
- 18. He May Not Be in A Relationship
- 19. He May Be in An Open Relationship but Doesn’t Make that Obvious on His Dating Profile
- 20. There Could Be Some Other Reason!
Why Do Men in Relationships Go On Dating Sites? (20 Common Reasons!)
1. He May Be Unhappy with His Current Relationship and Seeking a Way Out
Let’s be honest here, if a guy is on a dating site you know he’s in a relationship it’s more than likely a red flag.
He can’t be happy in his relationship unless he’s in an open relationship (more on that later).
If he’s looking to meet women on dating apps he’s either looking for a way out of his relationship subconsciously or consciously – because he’s taking a huge risk.
2. He May Be Seeking Attention or Validation from Other Women
Some guys who are in a relationship seek, need, and feed off the attention of other women.
Whether that’s flirting on an app, talking to them in person, or even sleeping with them – this type of attention-seeking behavior is often a sign of discontentment in the current relationship or points towards serious insecurities.
3. He May Be Struggling with Feelings of Loneliness or Isolation
It’s no secret that relationships have their ups and downs, and sometimes it can feel like your relationship lacks a certain spark.
This could cause a man to start feeling lonely or isolated – even if he’s in a healthy, long-term relationship.
Or, his partner might be away a lot and he really is lonely. But that’s still no excuse to go browsing dating sites!
4. He May Be Curious About What Else Is out There and Want to Explore His Options
It’s all too easy to become complacent when you’re in a long-term relationship, and it’s natural for some men to start wondering what else is out there.
This is only magnified if they’re feeling unsatisfied or unhappy in their current relationship.
The temptation to explore other options might be too much for them and so they turn to dating sites as a way to explore their options.
It’s hard to say what they’re looking for exactly, but it’s not going to end how they want!
5. He May Be Seeking a Way to Cheat on His Partner without Getting Caught
This is an obvious one, right?
No one wants to get caught cheating, so some men turn to dating sites as a way of having an affair without getting caught.
Or at least to get the ball rolling, so to speak, and start meeting other women.
If you don’t want to get caught up with a guy looking for a fling, then stay away from guys in relationships, whatever their excuse is.
6. He May Be Going Through a Midlife Crisis
A midlife crisis is a very real and serious thing for some men.
It can cause them to feel dissatisfied with their current life, relationship, or career – which in turn leads them to start exploring other avenues.
This could lead them to explore dating sites in an attempt to find someone new or different and to escape from their current life.
If this is the case it’s not going to end well for him and anyone who gets involved with him.
7. He Has only Ever Had One Relationship
If a man has only ever had one relationship then he might start to get an ‘itch’ and feel like he’s been missing out on something.
There could be any number of other emotional issues under the surface that are causing him to feel unsatisfied, too.
Again, getting mixed up with a guy who wants to play the field just because he’s only ever had one partner is a recipe for disaster.
8. He’s Looking for Someone Else with The Same Interests
If a guy’s current partner doesn’t have the same interests as him it can start to feel like a chore to spend time together and he probably spends a lot of time apart from her.
This can lead him to start looking elsewhere for someone who does share his interests – and dating apps are a convenient way to do that while finding a new partner!
9. He May Be Trying to Get Revenge for His Partner Cheating on Him
It’s not uncommon for a man to want revenge if his partner has cheated on him – particularly if it happened recently.
Obviously, this is a toxic reaction and will only make things worse, but it still happens.
It’s definitely not the healthiest way to deal with a betrayal, and you’ll only end up getting hurt, too, if you get involved with him.
10. He May Be Looking to Meet New People, Regardless of The Possibility of A Romantic Relationship
I have a friend who is in a relationship and uses dating apps to meet new people.
That’s right, he uses dating apps to make friends!
It works well, too, he’s transparent about it when meeting women and it seems to work for him so you can’t rule it out.
11. He May Be Struggling with A Lack of Intimacy in His Current Relationship
There might be one area where his current relationship is not fulfilling him, and that’s in the intimacy department.
Maybe he’s not getting enough physical affection or maybe his partner just isn’t interested in being intimate anymore.
Whatever the case, a lot of guys use dating apps for hookups so you need to be able to spot the signs if that’s the case and it’s not what you’re interested in.
12. He May Be Feeling Neglected or Undervalued in His Current Relationship
If he is feeling neglected or undervalued in his current relationship, a man might turn to dating apps to seek out someone who can make him feel special, valued and appreciated.
This is a red flag that the relationship he’s in isn’t working and makes him look like he doesn’t have the courage to work on the issues he has with his partner.
Again, it’s not a good sign if you’re interested in getting involved with him.
13. He May Be Going Through a Difficult Time in His Life and Seeking Support or Companionship from Others
Sometimes a person might be going through a difficult time and is just seeking out companionship or support from others.
He might not be looking for a romantic partner on a dating app, but simply feels like he doesn’t have anywhere else to look.
14. He May Be Seeking New Experiences or Adventures that He Feels His Current Relationship Is Lacking
If a man has been in a relationship for a long time and is starting to feel like his life is lacking new experiences or adventures, he may be looking to find them elsewhere.
Again, this is a sign that his relationship isn’t going well but he doesn’t have the emotional maturity to deal with it by talking to his partner.
15. He May Be Seeing If He Can Find His Friends or Even His Girlfriend/Wife on There!
This is one of the most innocent reasons why you might spot someone on a dating app who you know is in a relationship.
It’s possible – but not likely – that they’re just browsing the platform looking to check if someone else they know is using it.
Now, why would they use their own profile and potentially get themselves in trouble….well that’s something to ask them if you get the chance!
16. A Scammer Might Have Stolen His Images/Profile
This is another one of the unlikely, but possible excuses that someone might have if they deny being on a dating site.
Scamming is as popular as ever on dating sites and the main way someone scams is by stealing and using someone else’s images.
If you see a profile for a guy who you know is in a relationship, it’s worth considering it’s not him behind the account.
17. He May Have Forgotten He Has a Dating Profile Set Up!
It might sound like I’m giving these guys outs, but it is completely possible that he has forgotten he has even set up a dating profile.
This could be because of the amount of time since he created the account or just plain old forgetfulness!
In this case, it’s worth bringing it to his attention and seeing if he can explain himself before jumping to conclusions.
18. He May Not Be in A Relationship
It’s also possible that the guy isn’t in a relationship. I’m not sure why you think he is, but it might be worth double-checking.
The best way to do this is by bringing it up with him directly and seeing if he confirms or denies being in one.
It might even be that he’s become single as recently as a day or so before he started using the platform.
19. He May Be in An Open Relationship but Doesn’t Make that Obvious on His Dating Profile
It’s possible this guy is in an open relationship and his partner knows he’s using a dating app.
In this case, he might not make it obvious on his profile that he is in a relationship so as to avoid any potential awkwardness or judgment.
If you know him but didn’t know this about his relationship, this might come as quite the shock!
20. There Could Be Some Other Reason!
Finally, I want to add that it’s always important to have an open mind and not judge someone without speaking with them to find out why they’re using dating sites.
It’s possible that there’s another reason why he’s on a dating app and it could be totally innocent.
You don’t want to embarrass yourself by assuming the worst without having all the facts.
So it’s best to approach him and ask why he’s using the platform before jumping to any conclusions!
Image credits – depositphotos.com/stock-photo-young-man-laptop-using-website
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.