Does a guy friend suddenly or often get mad at you for no reason at all?
It can be confusing and upsetting when someone you consider a good friend, even a best friend, gets mad at you and you’re not sure what you’ve done wrong.
If you’re female and your friend is a guy, that does present a different dynamic than girlfriends; as I’m sure you’re aware.
Unfortunately, this is just how some people act or react to certain situations. If you value your friendship, you should figure out what is setting them off so you can try to avoid angering them (even though it’s not your fault).
It’s all part of learning what makes our friends tick, and learning to live with them!
Here are some of the common reasons why guy friends tend to get with girl friends for no reason:
5 Reasons Why Your Guy Friend May Be Mad at You
He Likes You More Than Just a Friend
When guys and girls are friends for a long time, feelings often come into the mix. For some people, this is what they’ve always wanted – for others, this is the last thing they ever wanted to happen.
It can certainly complicate a friendship, that’s an understatement. For some guys, they just tend to deal with feelings for a friend by getting mad.
Sometimes, it’s a way of pushing you away so they don’t ruin the friendship. They may be afraid of being knocked back, or even angry at themselves that they feel this way.
It’s hard to say. Maybe you’ll get to discuss it openly with your friend at some point if this is the reason why they got/get mad at you.
He’s Thinks You’ve Done Something to Cross Him
If a friend is mad at you, the obvious reason is that you’ve done something to annoy or anger them. Right?
Except, you’re not aware that you’ve done anything wrong. I’m sure this wouldn’t be the first time you’ve been on the receiving end of someone being annoyed at you for something you didn’t know you did.
Or, it may be that you’re completely innocent. Your friend might have their wires crossed, be listening to bad advice, or jumping to the wrong conclusions.
This is why talking it out is always the best solution. Sometimes a little communication and clearing up any confusion can take just a minute, and make them realize they’ve got it all wrong.
He’s Pushing You Away
Your guy friend might be being horrible to you as a way of pushing you away because he feels like he can’t speak up and tell you what’s on his mind.
I’ve heard of various reasons behind this over the years; peer pressure, they’re scared of getting too close and being hurt, they’re dealing with some personal issues, and so on.
By snapping or biting at you, they hope you’ll leave them alone without having to explain themselves. It rarely works like this though, as a friend, you want to know what’s wrong. So, you’re more likely to stick around and try to find out what’s bothering them.
He’s Dealing With Some Personal Issues
As I touched on above, if your friend is dealing with some personal issues and feels like he wants to be left alone, he may be snappy with you.
This could be because he’s stressed and under a lot of pressure, or it’s too difficult or hurtful for him to explain himself so he just lashes out.
If you suspect this is the reason, all you can do is make it clear you’re there for them. Then give them the time and space they need to deal with whatever they’re going through.
Related – Signs of a toxic relationship (and what to do)
He’s Jealous of You
Jealousy rears its ugly head in many different ways and causes people to act out in ways that are surprising and out of character.
It’s not uncommon for jealousy to creep in and complicate a friendship. It’s natural to want what others have, feel a little envious when friends get big breaks and compare yourself to those closest to you.
It can be devastating to share some huge news with a close friend, only to see they’re not happy for you. It’s happened to me, I know this feeling all too well.
Give them time to adjust and come to terms with whatever it is that’s grinding on them.
What Do You Do When Your Guy Best Friend Is Mad at You?
So, your friend is mad at you for something. Hopefully, from the list above you’re able to at least know why they’re mad.
Either way, assuming you want to get back to a harmonious place with them, you’ll almost certainly have to do one or more of the following:
Talk to them about it – Communication is always key. No matter how hard it is to bring up the topic, you have to talk about it to move past it. Be a listener first, and don’t get defensive or confrontational if possible.
Give them time – When people are angry, they need time to cool off. It’s never a good idea to try and resolve issues when emotions are high. You’ll have to judge the situation based on how well you know them in regards to how long they need.
Don’t get mad back – It never feels good to just take it, but getting angry back will only escalate the situation. Keep cool, listen to them, tell them you’re sorry they feel this way, and you’ll talk to them when they’ve cooled off. You’ll be surprised how good it feels to act like that!
Learn from it – Things happen, and friends fall out from time-to-time. Sometimes, it could have been avoided, other times not. To grow as friends, there needs to be some give and take. Learn from the experience in any way you can so as to avoid a repeat incident in the future if possible.
Friendships (good friendships) are one of the most rewarding and sometimes challenging dynamics we face as humans.
It’s how we deal with fallouts and learn from these experiences that make us who we are and define how strong our friendships are.
If your guy friend is mad at you for no reason and doesn’t look like he’s going to explain himself anytime soon, it’s up to you to figure out why and manage the situation.
Hopefully, the information in this article helps you get a better understanding of your friend and the dynamic of your relationship. You’ll be a lot closer for it in the future when you figure it out, that’s for sure.
Image credits – Photos by Amy Tran and Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.