‘My boyfriend is better looking than me and it makes me feel like he’ll leave me for someone more attractive…’
This is a very real dilemma for a lot of women.
If this is how you feel, you’re not alone – but you really shouldn’t be thinking like this.
Your boyfriend is with you because he loves you – and I’m sure it’s more of a self-esteem issue than anything else.
Is It a Problem if Your Boyfriend Is Better Looking than You?
Here’s the thing: if you’re in a relationship and your man is better looking than you, it really shouldn’t be a problem.
In fact, I can tell you that it’s not a problem. It’s actually a good thing if anything.
I mean, think about it this way – he chose to be with you out of all the other women in the world.
So obviously he loves you for who you are on the inside and I bet he thinks you’re the most beautiful girl in the world.
Also, it may be a self-esteem issue or just how you see things as well.
I’m sure there are some people who would say you’re the attractive one in the relationship.
If your boyfriend is getting attention from other girls, I’d take that as flattery.
I’m sure it can get annoying, especially if he’s playing up to it. But the worst thing you can do is say something horrible to them, or worse, to your boyfriend.
How handsome or attractive your boyfriend is will only be a problem if you (or he) allows it to be.
It’s important to work on your own self-confidence and self-esteem and raise your opinion of yourself.
You’ll suddenly realize that beauty isn’t just on the outside, and that you’re just as good-looking as he is.
Remember, Attractiveness Is in The Eye of The Beholder
I’m not saying your boyfriend is or isn’t better looking than you, I have no idea.
But what I can tell you is that attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder.
What this means is that everyone sees beauty differently.
One person may think you’re the most beautiful woman in the world, while another may not even see you as attractive.
It’s all subjective.
The important thing is not to judge people on what they look like, that’s a surefire way to end up thinking the wrong thing about someone.
You Need to Work on Your Self-Esteem if It’s an Issue
If you think your boyfriend is better looking than you and it’s causing issues in your relationship, it’s crucial you work on your self-esteem.
Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself and it’s something we all struggle with at times.
The reason it’s important is because if you don’t have good self-esteem, you’ll always be looking for validation from others.
You’ll also find it harder to believe that someone could love you for who you are on the inside.
This may be why you’re telling yourself that your boyfriend is better looking than you, too good for you, that he’ll leave you for someone else, etc.
It’s a destructive way to think and it’s only going to end up hurting you and your relationship in the end.
So, What Can You Do to Work on Your Self-Esteem?
One of the best things you can do is work on accepting yourself for who you are.
This includes your physical appearance, but also your personality, strengths, and weaknesses.
It’s not easy to do, but it’s so important you find ways to do this.
Another thing you can do is focus on the things that are important to you and make you happy.
For example, if you love spending time with your family and friends, make sure you’re doing that as much as possible.
Or if you love exercising or writing, make time for those things too.
Doing things that make you happy will help to increase your self-esteem and make you feel good about yourself.
The bottom line is that it’s perfectly normal to worry about whether or not your boyfriend is better looking than you.
But it’s important to remember that attractiveness is subjective and that you should focus on working on yourself as a person.
Talk About It with Your Boyfriend
Something else that’s crucial to your emotional wellbeing and your relationship is that you talk about how you feel with your boyfriend.
It’s easy for a lot of guys to try and brush something like this off or get an even bigger ego, but it’s important that you try and make him realize how you feel about it.
It’s possible he has no idea how you feel and that he would be more than happy to talk about it with you.
But even if he doesn’t want to talk about it, it’s still important that you express how you feel.
It will help you to communicate better with each other and understand each other’s needs.
Who knows, maybe it’s been making him feel uneasy when people comment about how he looks or if other girls show an interest in him.
Either way, you have to have a conversation about it. Nothing good will come of you holding in the feelings you’re experiencing.
I bet you feel a bit better just talking about it with him, and I’m sure he’ll reassure you that he’s with you because he loves you and finds you attractive!
Image credits – Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.