Asking a coworker out is a nerve-racking experience, and it can easily create an awkward situation if you don’t do it right.
If you’re nervous about asking out a coworker you like, I’m going to cover how you should approach them and what you should say to make it go as smoothly as possible!
Here are 10 tips explaining how to ask a coworker out without making it awkward:
How to Ask a Coworker Out Without Making It Awkward – 10 Tips!
1. Make Sure They’re Single!
If you want to avoid an awkward situation when asking out a coworker, the most important thing you need to do is make sure they’re single first!
The last thing you want to do is ask someone out who’s already in a relationship because that would not only be awkward for you, but also for them.
You might have to ask some questions and do a little detective work, act appropriately when doing so and act on the best information you can get.
2. Discuss It with Friends Before Doing Anything
If you’re really set on asking out a coworker and want to make sure you don’t make any mistakes, it’s always a good idea to discuss it with your friends first.
This is a good rule when asking anyone out, not just someone you work with!
They might be able to give you some helpful tips or tell you things you didn’t even think about.
It’s easy to get tunnel visioned when you like someone and want to ask them out, a little outside perspective can only help.
3. Prepare Yourself for All Possible Outcomes
When you’re asking a coworker out, you need to be prepared for all possible outcomes.
The person you ask might say yes, they might say no, or they might say they need some time to think about it.
You can’t control what their answer will be, but being prepared for each answer and knowing what you’re going to say and do will help avoid any awkward reactions or silences.
4. Rehearse What You’re Going to Say
This might feel a bit silly, but take it from me – rehearsing what you’re going to say out loud is going to make a huge difference.
When you hear yourself saying the words, how you’re going to ask them out, it’ll help you figure out if what you’re planning to say sounds natural or forced.
Plus, it’ll also help you say the words without stumbling or making awkward mistakes and silences on the day!
5. Approach Your Coworker at The Right Time
This is crucial, how and when you approach your coworker when you ask them out is going to be the difference between an awkward and potentially embarrassing experience, and a smooth one.
You need to make sure you approach them at a time when there’s nobody else around, and ideally, you should catch them at the end of the day when they’re getting ready to leave.
This way, you can have a short conversation without interrupting their work, you can ask them out in private, and they won’t feel pressured to answer you on the spot or worry about what other people are thinking.
6. Ask Them Out!
OK, let’s not avoid the obvious here, you’re going to have to ask your coworker out – without it being awkward.
There’s no easy way to do this, but the key is to just be confident and go for it!
Remember, you’ve rehearsed what you’re going to say, you know what their possible answers might be, and you’re going to approach them at the perfect time.
Now is your chance!
7. Make Sure You Listen to What They Say
This might sound like common sense, but you’d be surprised how many people don’t listen to what the other person is saying when they’re asking them out.
For example, if they say they need time to think about it, don’t try and force them into giving you an answer there and then.
Think of the situation from their perspective, they’ve probably been caught off guard and aren’t sure what to say.
If they ask for time, say they aren’t sure, or even say no, accept their answer with a smile and move on.
If they want to say yes, they will. Even if they have to get back to you later.
8. Use Open and Confident Body Language
I love the saying, “actions speak louder than words” because it’s so often true.
Body language in particular says a lot about what someone is really thinking and feeling, and can have an impact on how awkward you come across.
When you’re asking your coworker out, make sure you use confident and open body language.
Stand up straight, make eye contact, smile, and keep your arms by your sides rather than crossed in front of your chest.
All of these small things will make a big difference in how confident and assured you come across.
NB: winking can be a bit cheesy, but here’s what it means when a coworker winks at you!
9. Whatever Happens, Don’t Treat Them Any Differently Afterward
This is important, whether they say yes or no to your offer, remember that you have to work together and you don’t want things to be awkward going forward.
You might be feeling embarrassed or awkward, but the last thing you want to do is make them feel uncomfortable too.
If they say yes, great!
But don’t make a big deal out of it, just treat them the same as you always have done.
If they say no or need time to think about it, don’t sulk or give them the silent treatment.
Again, just act like nothing has happened and carry on as normal!
10. Most Importantly – Just Be Yourself!
This is the most important tip of all.
When you’re asking a coworker out, it’s important to just be yourself.
Don’t try to be someone you’re not, and don’t put on an act.
Even if you feel like you’re too goofy normally, that’s fine.
Just be confident, relaxed, and friendly, and you’ll be sure to make a good impression.
Asking a coworker out can be a daunting task, but it doesn’t have to be awkward or embarrassing.
By following the tips in this blog post, you can ensure that you approach them at the right time, in the right way, and with the right mindset.
Just remember to be confident, be yourself, and to listen to what they say.
Even if you don’t get a date, at the very least you’re working on your interpersonal skills and anyone with any amount of decency will be flattered you asked them out!
Image credits – depositphotos.com/stock-photo-business-team-at-coffee-break
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.