We all know, or have known toxic people. By this I mean, they offer nothing productive and their negativity spreads over us and on to others around us.
The toxicity is a real problem. Left alone, it grows and manifests and becomes an even bigger problem.
People who needlessly criticize us, go out of their way to be unhelpful, always say you can’t achieve your goals, etc. These are examples of toxic people, and you need to handle them appropriately.
So exactly do you handle these types of people to keep the damage to a minimum? What do you do if these people are close to you, maybe even family?
The situation can be sensitive, and needing to be handled carefully. It’s important you don’t get caught up in the storm too, you don’t want to become affected by the negative energy.
There are a few ways and methods that are effective. You will have to take a close look at your own individual circumstances. But here are some pointers to get you started.
6 Helpful Tips You Need to Know to Deal with Toxic People
Take 5 and Talk to the Toxic Person One-On-One
The worst thing you can do is either ignore the person causing the problem, or get angry at them. Problems can only be resolved by people talking it out with calm heads.
Let your guard down a little to bring the person in on a compassionate level. Explain how you’re feeling, and how they make you feel. If they have any compassion at all you should at least make a step forward to resolving this.
Talk to Friends and Family about the Situation
We all feel better when talking to trusted friends or family members about difficult times. Choose the person carefully, you don’t want to burden someone. Or involve someone with an invested interest.
Sharing a problem certainly lets a weight off our minds. You will probably get some great advice too. Or have your eyes opened to things you previously didn’t think of.
Surround Yourself with More Positive Friends
Although toxic people cause a larger range of fall-out than your average negative person. They still need to operate in a group without much resistance. The more positive friends you have, the less effective the toxic person will be.
Distance yourself from the toxicity too. Sometimes this isn’t possible when it’s a work colleague or close family member. But you can always tactfully distance yourself a little.
Kill Them with Kindness
Have you heard of the saying ‘kill them with kindness’? It’s not as gruesome as it sounds, it merely means be nice and compassionate to a point that the other person feels bad for their own actions.
Maybe it will make them change their ways. Maybe it will not. But if you’re kind, compassionate, and respectful throughout. You will always feel good about yourself, while the toxic person will feel bad.
Never Take out Your Anger or Frustration on Anyone
It’s too easy to get wound up when someone constantly attacking you in one way or another. The worst thing you can do is get frustrated and take it out on people you care about.
When you’re feeling wound up, do whatever works to calm yourself down. Take a walk, talk it over with a friend, meditate, you choose.
Find out Why They Are Behaving The Way They Do
I’m not suggesting you become some sort of therapist. Neither is it a good idea to stick your nose into someone else’s business. But if you can understand why someone is behaving in a negative way towards you, you can manage the situation better.
Don’t make it obvious. But if there is something you can do to minimize the negative behavior, and lessen your own stress around the situation, do it.
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.