If you’re saying to yourself, “My boss has changed towards me, what does it mean?”
The answers probably lie within their behavior and how they’ve changed.
It might be that they’re under a lot of pressure, unhappy with your work, having personal issues, or a number of things.
If it’s making you uneasy, the important thing is that you figure out what’s up with them and if there is anything you can do about it.
My Boss Has Changed Towards Me! (Here’s What to Do About It)
Ask Your Coworkers if They Know What’s Up
If your boss has started acting differently towards you, the first thing you should do is ask your coworkers if they’ve noticed.
See if anyone has any insights into why they’re acting differently to you and if they’re also being off with your coworkers.
It’s possible that someone knows about something going on in their work or professional life and can give you some context for their recent behavior.
Have a Frank Discussion With Your Boss
This isn’t going to be an easy conversation to have, but it’s necessary nevertheless.
If your boss’ attitude has changed towards you something is up, and you have the right to know what it is if it’s affecting you.
Schedule a meeting with them and explain that you’ve noticed they’ve been acting differently and explain how it’s making you feel.
You’ll know them better than I do and how to best approach this.
You might want to offer to help them if they need it, or simply ask what’s going on and if there’s anything you can do.
See where the conversation goes, hopefully, this is the start of getting to the bottom of it and them returning to how they used to treat you.
Don’t Take It Personally
I think it’s always important to not take any work-related issues personally.
We can get wrapped up in our work and think that everything someone does is a direct reflection on us, but that’s not always the case.
If your boss is acting weird or different toward you, it’s more likely a reflection on them than it is on you.
It sounds like they have an issue, even if it’s with you, and they’re not able to deal with it professionally or come out and talk to you about it.
If you don’t take it personally, it will not affect you as much and most importantly their attitude shouldn’t affect you when you’re out of work.
Start Noting Down Any Incidents that Are Affecting You
If you’re really struggling with the way your boss is treating you and it’s impacting your work, then start noting down any incidents.
This will help you keep track of what’s been going on, when it started, and how it made you feel.
If things continue to escalate, you might need to take this evidence to your HR department.
But, for now, just focus on documenting what’s been going on to help you get a better understanding of how they’re acting.
Escalate the Issue to Their Manager or HR if Necessary
If you’ve tried to talk to your boss about their behavior and nothing has changed, then it might be time to escalate the issue.
This only applies to a situation where your work is being impacted in some way, you can’t just report your boss for being ‘off’ with you.
If it does come to this, you can try and talk to their manager or your HR department and explain what’s been going on.
They’ll be able to look into the issue and see if there’s anything that can be done.
It would be helpful if you have evidence to back up your claims, which is why I mentioned taking brief notes of any incidents.
See if There Is Anything You Can Do to Rebuild the Bridges
Maybe your boss told you what was on their mind when you had a chat or maybe they denied anything was different.
Either way, it might be worth seeing if there is anything you can do to cheer them up (if they’re down), or rebuild any bridges that seem to be falling apart.
It’s not always possible to fix the situation, but it doesn’t hurt to try.
It might just take something like you being super nice to them, surprising them with a little gift, or just letting them know that you’re there if they need you.
It’s better than acting like nothing has changed or being negative towards them and it’s possible they need a friend right now.
Distance Yourself from Them and Focus on Your Work
If your boss is really starting to affect you and your work and you can’t figure out why their attitude has changed towards you, then it might be time to distance yourself from them.
This doesn’t mean being rude or ignoring them, but it does mean not letting their behavior bother you.
Focus on your work and try to create a healthy distance between you and them.
If you used to be close, it’s a shame that things have changed.
But you can’t hold on to the hope that things will go back to how they were and be miserable in the meantime.
Decide if You Can Carry on Like This or Start Job Searching
There is always the possibility that your boss’ attitude towards you isn’t going to change back to how it was and might even continue to get worse.
Maybe it’s something to do with you or your work, or maybe it’s them, you might never know.
What you need to do is prioritize your happiness and do everything you can to ensure you enjoy coming to work and are able to leave at the end of the day feeling satisfied and fulfilled.
If that isn’t happening and you can’t see a way out, it might be best if you look for another job.
The downside is that you’ll be leaving a job you otherwise love and you’ll miss your coworkers.
But the upside is that you’ll be doing what’s best for you and your mental health and I’m sure you’ll find a better job.
Only you can decide if this is the right decision for you to make.
I hope this article has helped you in some way and that you’re able to figure out what’s going on with your boss.
It’s not always easy to deal with something like your boss changing how they act towards you as people and working relationships can be complex.
But as long as you do everything in your power to get to the bottom of it you can hold your head high!
Image credits – Photo by David Veksler on Unsplash
Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future.